


High On Legal Marijuana

by TheMsource



Series: Songs of Fate [2]
Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Acceptance, Angst, Culture, Depression, Drug Use, Explicit Language, F/M, Fluff, Friendship, Love, Past Drug Addiction, Pheromones, Philosophy, Romance, Slice of Life, Slow Burn, Smoking, Soulmates, Trauma
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-16
Updated: 2019-09-22
Packaged: 2020-01-14 23:07:06
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 38,444
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18486304
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheMsource/pseuds/TheMsource
Summary: When all you want is a cigarette, but the only one that can possibly come to your rescue is far from human.You didn't realize just how interesting monsters truly were.





	1. Out of Cigs and Out of Patience

**Author's Note:**

> Hey thanks for stopping by! As you've probably seen this is the second work in my 'Songs of Fate' series.
> 
> Let me reassure you that you don't need to read IGCYLR to understand this, they can be read completely separately.  
> And really should be considered their own works. :P
> 
> Very mature themes ahead, mind the tags! They will be added to as we go as well!
> 
> Fair warning

If you had to take another customer yelling at you for the pricing on _toilet paper_ you were going to _lose_ it! Working at the Stop N Shop should’ve been an easy job; it paid well and barely ever had a full store of customers. But _certain_ shoppers just liked to be a hassle. Mark your coworker looked at you sympathetically, his mossy brown hair falling flat as he ran a hand over it. 

“Sorry about that Y/N, you know how Ms. Green can get.” You huffed. Of course you knew how she could get, you were the one who ended up _dealing_ with her the most! Every time that woman set foot in the store your reliable boss and ever loyal coworker would mysteriously vanish. At this point you wondered if you'd be able to blackmail a raise for your suffering.

“Whatever, she’s just upset her husband was the one to cheat this time. Honestly I don’t know why she acts that way when she sleeps with half the city council.” Mark chuckled, his pale freckled face turning a light shade of pink. Sometimes he looked so cute, if only he had a more mature personality to him. It really was a shame how much you knew he was into you, guy had gotten a thing for you from the first time you ever set foot in the store. A part of you wanted to feel bad, but the stuff you both so obviously disagreed on prevented you from having a drop of guilt. He was defensive just as you were, you'd both had your fair share of spats by this time.

“That's bad Y/n.” You shrugged as you eyed the clock. You had been working for about four hours now and had dealt with that horrible woman for two, you deserved a break. As soon as the minute hand landed on the five you took that as your sign. You shot Mark an award winning smile hoping he wouldn’t protest at your upcoming statement.

“Hey I’m going to take my break now.” And of course your smile dropped, because Mark always had to protest in some way. You tried your best not to roll your eyes as Mark twitched his nose in agitation, his brown eyes shooting you a disgusted glare. He knew what you liked to do on your breaks. This is why when you thought of him being cute the word _sometimes_ always popped up. Because right now he was looking real ugly with that judging look on his face.

“You really should quit you know, it’s an _awful_ habit.” Just as bad as his _porn addiction_ really, you thought bitterly. Well it wasn’t like porn could give you cancer but still, what you chose to do with your lungs was your business. Why did it even matter to him really, you weren't dating and you were already set that you never would.

“Hm, Mark are you my _boyfriend_?” You asked innocently, fighting back a snicker as he blushed.

“Uh N-no…” You loved how easy he was to fluster. You could cut off a heated argument just by simply complimenting him or batting your eyes. It was sad really.

“Mhm, are you even... _fucking_ me?~” You teased in a sing song tone, your lips curved upward mischievously. 

He wished. You watched him turn scarlet as he shook his head, the box he'd picked up almost slipping from his hands. Poor boy was sweating and looked positively feint at this point. You sighed and decided to show him some mercy by not drawing out his torment.

“Then kindly keep your whole bad habit speech to yourself.” You felt a small pang of guilt at the hurt on his face but you were tired of hearing the _same_ spiel he’d try to force every time you’d go on break, it'd probably annoy you less if he could've at least switched up his 'talk' every now and again. But Nope, same words and sentences in the same order. Wow you could tell just how stressed you were and how badly you really needed the nicotine. You just weren’t up for the whole ‘I wanna be your boyfriend but you’re a smoker so I’ll fix you first’ speech. Not that it mattered anyway.

Not that _anything_ really mattered.

You'd probably apologize to him later if you remembered. With a polite wave you slid off your apron and hung it by the employee entrance, your boss also being against smoking had insisted on you not wearing the shops logo while indulging in the habit. You hated the apron anyway, so win for you! 

Quickly before another customer showed up you rushed out the back and rounded the corner straight to the park. It was another benefit of working where you did; it wasn’t too far into the crowded city that it felt dreary just to walk out of it or too crowded to even go into it. Not to mention the city's largest park was only a road away.

Honestly you had liked the park the moment you had seen it when you’d gone to apply. It always looked as if the trees were in full bloom and the grass was never covered in litter or trash. Despite that it was already fall. The city really kept it cleaned up the most out of any of the others scattered throughout this kingdom of pavement and steel. It was a refreshing splash of color in a world of gray. And now it was your sweet escape from the stress of work. From the stress of people in general really. 

You hastened to the smokers area, a small designated spot situated in the center of a small ring of trees just by the parks lake, and smiled at how deserted it was. you panned your eyes back and forth as you twirled and spun on the spot making sure you couldn't see anyone nearby at all before letting out a small whoop. 

This was great! You were all but guaranteed peace and quiet. You reached for your pack in your back pocket and frowned, your hand coming away with a crumbled ball of collapsed plastic. Your eye twitched.

It was empty.

_Damn!_

Why did it always have to be on _Thursday_? You looked around for another smoker and pulled up short. 

On a bench perfectly placed in front of the parks small lake a figure lounged, a small cloud of pure white smoke curling upward from them. Odd, you could've sworn you had been alone. You licked your lips nervously as another thick white cloud bellowed up from them, twisting and fading into the cold fall air. The sight was enough to make your lungs itch in want and mouth twitch wantonly. Any question you had to their almost sudden appearance vanishing.

You were honestly contemplating how much of a hypocrite you’d be, to go over and bug the person who’d possibly come for the peace and quiet to relax just like you had. But at the same time you were craving a cig bad. Two hours of an old hag bugging you over toilet paper? You deserved one. Not to mention a familiar throb had started to take up residence in the back of your head. There was no way you could work if you got a smoker's headache. Those were worse than regular migraines.

Slowly you made your way over trying to be as quiet as possible not wanting to startle them. This was the city of course so muggings were still a thing. As you got closer you looked at the smoker curiously, your eyes widening in surprise. He was a monster, a skeleton specifically, with a cigarette dangling precariously from his mouth. You blinked. You weren't aware monsters had started migrating so much, then again the city had adopted a free employment initiative for the new species recently.

The only thing that convinced you he was a monster and not a joke someone set up was the way the cigarette would burn for a moment and then a puff of smoke would slip out from between his flat teeth…and _wisp_ out of the top of his white shirt. If you stared hard enough you could see a bit of a collar bone peeking out. You held back a giggle, you were seeing actual _exposed_ bone! The closest you'd ever been to such a thing was the discovery channel. The thought should've probably creeped you out but it was so shocking and new it made you giddy practically.

He slouched lazily against the back of the bench, his hands pocketed in his deep blue jacket. His skull was white as what you’d expect of bone and he wore a wide grin on his face, his cigarette tucked seemingly between his first and second left tooth. He looked as if he was sleeping with his sockets shut as he breathed. Wait his sockets were closed? You wondered how he had eyelids briefly. Or why he even needed to breath. Did he have a random pair of floating lungs beneath his shirt?

You looked at your feet awkwardly once you realized you were gawking. You’d rarely seen monsters before; they were rare to see inside city limits usually staying in the rural Ebott area. So was it really that much of a surprise you were doing it? But would bugging him be offensive? Staring was often considered rude but you personally felt randomly _approaching_ someone you didn't even know was more so. Just as you struggled on rather or not to walk away his right socket halfheartedly opened, a white speck of light sliding along the bottom and rising up to focus on you. _He had lights in his eyes?_ You shook your head, trying to clear your thoughts. Great, it was too late to back out now. Might as well go for broke.

“Hey…uh _awkward_ as this is I was wondering if you had a spare?” You asked cheerily as you waved your empty package for emphasis. His eyelight panned over to it and then back to you. He was…silent. You forced your smile to remain on your face as he continued to stare. After a torturous moment he slowly slid his hand out from his jacket and held up a single cig for you. The stick held up languidly between smooth white phalanges. 

You took a moment to observe his hand; it looked like a skeleton hand but the bones were slightly thicker, the obvious joints were dark but surprising most of all was the fact he had bone like skin lacing between his metacarpals giving the appearance of a ‘fleshed’ out hand. Thinking back on the glimpse you’d seen of his collar, you noticed and began to assume all of his bones were thicker than what a typical humans would be. You could even glimpse what looked like a _palm_ cupped upwards from his holding. How _interesting_. Your smile became less strained and more genuine.

“Thanks!” You said gratefully as you reached out to take it, noting how warm his bones felt as you brushed them and the hardened texture. As soon as you had a hold on it he repocketed his hand, closed his open socket and went back to lounging. You looked down a moment at the spare space on the bench and then quickly and quietly claimed a seat. 

“Don’t mind if I sit here do you?” The monster shrugged as he billowed out another cloud, the smoke twining smoothly between his teeth. You guessed his silence was acceptance, or his shrug was literally indifferent seeing as you'd already taken the seat. You lit your smoke and groaned in satisfaction as the ache in your lungs and the pounding that had started in your head eased. The sensation was like a splash of cool water and you reveled in it.

You sat silently just enjoying the scenery before you were finally temped to glance at the skeleton beside you. He had the same socket cracked once more and watching you. Maybe he was curious about you? The thought made you smile wider, you were definitely curious about him.

“I’m Y/n by the way. You have a name?” He closed his socket again and this time he chuckled as his grin lifted at the corners. You waited for a response but soon accepted you weren’t going to get one. That’s okay, maybe he was shy around humans. You knew your race wasn’t exactly the most welcoming let alone accepting bunch.

You both lapsed back into silence and continued to smoke till finally the skeleton reached up and withdrew the butt of the cigarette from between his teeth. You watched as he stood and flicked it into the nearby trashbin, the butt landing perfectly along the rim where it spun for a moment before slipping downward into its new home. 

You snorted, that was pretty good! Casually he turned and began to walk off but you really couldn’t resist getting his attention before he vanished.

“Hey!” He paused to glance back at you, both his dark sockets now opened where his eyelights rested. They were kind of bewitching how they floated freely but remained fixed even as their lights flickered and gently pulsed. You really liked them.

“Thanks again…mister skeleton.” You smiled. His sockets widened for a moment, a single amused snort sounding from him as he turned and resumed his walking. Well, that had been a bit awkward but exciting. You stared at the water in front of you. This spot was definitely relaxing. Or maybe it had been the new company? He really intrigued you, a skeleton but not really. A smoker _without_ lungs maybe? You wondered if you’d see him again.


	2. What's the Name

How did this happen?

Every.

Damn.

Time.

You glared at your empty cigarette drawer like it had insulted your mother. It honestly didn’t make sense to you, you’d purchased what? Eight packs last Friday? You honestly didn’t think of yourself like a chain smoker, a pack would usually last about a day and a half. Usually. Then again as it was Ms. Green had made an unexpected stop at the store yesterday. You wouldn’t be surprised if you’d over smoked just to spite Mark, because like clockwork he still complained about your habit.

You closed the drawer a bit hard in your frustration and sighed. You were due at work in fifteen minutes so you didn’t have time to stop and then make it on time. You’d think your boss would sell the pricey cancer sticks, but no! He was anti-smoker like Mark, religiously so. It was frustrating; you’d purposefully bought an extra pack to avoid having to have the same situation like last week. You hated bumming for your habit.

You rolled your eyes as you locked up your apartment and headed down the stairs. Now you’d have to go a whole day without your fix, just wonderful. Was it too much to pray Ms. Green for the first time in history didn’t need toilet paper on Thursday? More frustrating is having to hope there was someone you could bum when you went for your break. 

You wondered briefly if the monster would be there as you started your car. He hadn’t been there since you’d last seen him and you hoped you hadn’t accidentally chased him off. If he was there would he even be willing to loan you another one? He had seemed rather off when you’d asked him, that too long pause playing in your mind. Maybe he’d be more receptive with a joke? Everyone loves humor! Monsters to right? You hummed as you tried to come up with something, your car pulling out and racing down the street.

Ms. Green came in. You had never contemplated murder so hard in your life. She’s usually bad, insisting on ‘feeling’ the product even though it’s the same brand she’d bought a million times before. If she approved it she then demanded an unfelt package because hygiene for her guests or whatever. This time however it was the company that had screwed you over. They’d changed the logo. And because Ms. Green wasn’t exactly all there she assumed a different design was a different formula. 

“I said this won’t do!” She shouted for the hundredth time, spittle shooting out of her mouth to land haphazardly on your face. You held your smile, casually wiping at your face like you’d been sweating and sweetly repeated yourself.

“Ms. Green, I assure you it is exactly the same. The only thing new is the package.” Like the bitter old crone she was she ripped a whole roll out of the ‘feeling’ package and tossed it at you. You didn’t even try to catch it instead opting to let it fall and sadly unroll itself till it hit the back of the register. The poor roll would never have a home now.

“It feels nothing like it used to!” She said flipping her poorly permed red hair, her brown eyes glaring daggers at you. Actually, you wouldn’t have minded if she could shoot daggers from her eyes, maybe you could catch one as a souvenir…and stab her with it. Ok that was a dangerous train of thought and you really needed a smoke. Your eyes glanced up briefly to the clock; you were at least five minutes out from your normal break.

“Y/n! Are you listing to me!?” Oh god she’d called you by your fist name, only people that were people could use your first name. Well that’s how it would go in your imaginary world where your job was well paying and boring and you had an endless supply of cancer stress relief sticks. You tried the nicotine patch you really did and it just wasn’t working for you. So now perfect world included smoking yourself to death. YOU NEEDED A CIGARETTE! You looked to see your boss peaking from behind the chip rack, his toupee barely fully on his head. You smiled mischievously.

“Would you like to see my manager Ms. Green?” The old bag huffed with annoyance. Your poor boss was glaring like you were a traitor. Oh well, he should consider selling cigs. At least to you.

“If you’re going to continue to be useless yes I would.” You gestured towards him, making sure Ms. Green caught sight of him preventing any type of ninja sneaking skills he might had spontaneously learned in the span of two minutes. His glower as he walked over was enough to tell you he’d be having you work the weekend. Which you were fine with. Not like he was having you pull any doubles during a weekday, those were annoying.

“Can I help you Ms. Green?” He asked all false sweetness. You fought not to snicker as she began a tirade about the brand situation. Poor guy had to keep a straight face as if he were hearing the whole thing for the first time. You bit your lip as you motioned smoking to him and rushed past him, his eyes glaring at you till he couldn’t see you without turning. You were in such a rush you almost took your apron with you. 

“Break?” Mark asked casually. You stared at him and glanced over to your obviously dangling apron and back to him, contemplating if you truly had the patience for him. He raised an expectant brow and you merely frowned before turning on your heel and storming out towards the park. You weren’t apologizing for this one. Once you reached the familiar area you stopped and looked around, there was maybe four other smokers but none of them was your skeleton. You waltzed over to the bench you both usually sat at and stopped. It was empty.

You silently cursed and made to leave, only getting halfway to the area’s edge when you noticed a familiar blue hoodie waltzing along one of the small stone paths, and where was it going? The bench. Your buddy had arrived. You tried to look casual but couldn’t keep the smug smile off your face as you thought about the joke you had made this morning. You didn’t even care about the questioning stares the other humans were giving you as you approached the singular monster. Not that you’d care normally anyways.

You thought you were being smooth and casual enough that he wouldn’t spot you but apparently for a being lacking actual eyes he was super observant. He paused with his lighter hallway to his cigarette in surprise as you approached him, the dangling stick bobbing once in silent question. Oh. This was perfect.

“Question mister skeleton!” You exclaimed as you reached into your pocket, not wasting a moment to let him get his bearings. The monster tilted his head curiously, lowering his lighter a moment as you closed in on him. Did he just raise a brow at you? Huh another interesting thing you just learned about him. Note to self, skeletons have brow bones.

“What did the smoker say to the cigarette?~” You sing songed as you stopped beside him. He blinked as you quickly pulled out a match box and lit one. He stared as you held the flame to his smoke and lit it.

“It’s a _match_.” You grinned. His smile grew as he drew a breath, making the end catch and climb an inch as it consumed the tabacoo. He puffed out some smoke as you put out the match, his hand drifting down to his pocket and extracting another cig for you.

“that was terrible.” He chuckled, his deep baritone making a small shiver of happiness run through you. You did not expect him to have a voice like that! If he was into voice acting you could totally see him playing Zeus or some other mythical deity. You grabbed for the offered stick unashamedly, a small blush not on your face, at all. You were even pleasantly surprised when he scooted over slightly offering you more of the bench. You smiled as you claimed the spot and hastily lit your prize. You breathed out a thick cloud with a sigh as the nicotine quickly hit you. 

“the world tongue-twister champion just got arrested.” He said casually as if discussing the weather. You looked at him curiously.

“Did they?” He blew out a huff of smoke, his eyelights seeming to shine a bit brighter.

“yeah, I hear they’re going to give him a really _tough sentence_.” It took you a moment to get the joke to click, but once it did you broke into a loud laugh earning a smirk from the skeleton.

Monsters liked jokes as much as humans apparently.

Your break was over before you could blink, your monster buddy having left before you again. You wondered what kind of job he had that you only ever saw him at the park on Thursday. You stared at the dead cigarette butt in your hand and smiled.

Maybe you didn’t need to worry so much about having enough cigs to make it through the week. You were honestly enjoying this strangers company and having cigs could mean he wouldn’t see a reason to hang out with you. That wouldn’t be good. You threw the butt away and smirked. You were going to bond with that monster. And you were going to learn his name to!

You had put your plan into action and so far it had gone pretty well, it had been smooth for the last three weeks. Until today. 

You barely made it halfway to the bench when the monster looked towards you. It had almost become routine at this point. You’d run out of cigs on Thursday, kinda hehe, because lord knows you never planned on how many packs you’d need when shopping, and then you’d seek out the friendly-ish skeleton to at least tide you over til after your shift ended. He never turned you down, never protested. He continued to watch you as you took a seat beside him and smiled.

“Hey, fancy seeing you here.” You joked earning a light chuckle from him. He was silent a moment before reaching into his front pocket and pulling out his cigarette pack.

“are you a lonely human or something?” the skeleton asked as he held out his pack with one cigarette raised for you. You took it gingerly as you tried to read his expression, but it was carefully neutral. You knew the unasked question in his tone, there were several humans around on break that you could’ve asked, but you always came to him.

Sure this whole thing had started because you were jonzing for a smoke but you had to admit, you started to like his companionship. Hence the reason you’d been purposefully setting yourself up to run out of cigs just in time to see him.

The careful silence and occasional glances, maybe a joke here or there, it was nice. Better than when you were alone, or even with another human which would sometimes turn awkward. Maybe you had been a bit lonely. Now that was new, being lonely. You smiled as you lit it and took a deep drag before answering.

“Sometimes, but isn’t everyone on occasion? C’mon mister skeleton, surely you get a bit _bonely_ from time to time?” You teased. His eyelights seemed to brighten for just a moment as the corners of his grin turned upward. You were both silent as you smoked and watched the ducks flapping on the surface of the lake, their obliviousness something you envied silently. The skeleton closed his eyes in relaxation already appearing to be asleep, his cig securely between his teeth. You’d already learned there was no way it was falling out, even when he was dead asleep. You leaned back and glanced at the passing clouds. It was almost serene.

“sans.” You tilted your head in question. He exhaled a cloud of smoke, and even though his eyes were closed it seemed he was able to read your confusion.

“my name. it’s sans, sans the skeleton.” You couldn’t help the smile that tugged at your lips. You knew you’d get his name eventually.


	3. The First One's Always A Doozy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 55 kudos at 2 chapters in! WOOT!
> 
> Here's an update!

You felt empty. Completely numb as your eyes dropped to the ground and landed on a passing ant. You wondered briefly if it had any ant friends, would its little ant family miss it if you stepped on it? Want its little ant body back for an ant funeral? Did ants have funerals?

Nope. You weren’t doing this. _Not today_! You hurriedly pulled out your cigarette pack and shoved a stick in your mouth, your shaky hands quickly shoving the pack back into your pants and withdrawing a lighter. You forced the shaking to stop long enough to light your smoke and sighed as you puffed on it. You gave it a moment, and then another. The familiar rush and taste of nicotine didn’t do squat. 

Welp, so much for that plan.

You tried not to think of Mark, how he had looked as you’d come into work. His hair had been slightly greasy as if he hadn’t showered in a while, a thick five o’ clock shadow that definitely told of how he hadn’t bothered to shave, but most importantly was how blown his pupils had looked. They had been the size of dinner plates, large enough they could have swallowed you whole and spat you back out without registering you’d fallen into them in the first place.

At first you’d thought he’d been high, maybe some weed he was trying for the first time or something. It had been hilarious to you, seeing a person go on their first trip always was. But it was when he started to _twitch_ , how he suddenly bounced back and forth from happy to aggressive, when he didn’t remember you handing him an inventory sheet that it hit you. He wasn’t tripping out on weed. 

It was _worse_.

Had you pushed him to do it? Had you been so harsh to him that to drown away his troubles he had taken to putting a fucking needle somewhere in his body? Where was the tipping point? Was it when you’d teased him about not being your boyfriend? When you’d made a back handed comment about his ability to simply stack a shelf? When you’d walked away from him last week completely ignoring him? Or did this not even have anything to do with you?

The countless thoughts had swarmed in your head for hours during your shift. You tried to get Mark to take a break, chill out for a bit but he had only snapped and accused you of trying to get him in trouble. You even tried to do most of his work for him, the stuff he was missing. He had gotten so upset he’d thrown a jar of pickles and shattered it against the wall. 

You were just glad the boss and no customers had been there.

And now here you were…numb because your emotions had given out hours ago after straining to help and comfort. Trying to get some semblance of peace and relaxation to course through you. The nicotine wasn’t doing its job. You wanted to be angry, maybe insult it’s mother for the piss poor job it was doing. But you couldn’t bring yourself to care; Mark’s eyes would flash across your vision every time your mind even got close to feeling something.

Triggered depression was just the _worst_.

Dully you looked up and your eyes widened slightly. Sans was sitting at your normal bench, a…pink? cloud of smoke drifting up and away from him. It wasn’t a Thursday. Why was he here? Then again did he really need a reason? What a big bony monster couldn’t just come to the park to chill whenever they felt like it? 

Wow.

Even your thoughts were becoming apathetic and slightly aggressive.

You were going to go say hi.

Because that was better than whatever _this_ was that you were doing.

You casually walked over, your legs for some reason feeling slightly like lead because your body obviously didn’t want to move. Poor thing probably wanted you to just sit in a corner and stare blankly at a wall for hours. You weren’t repeating that again. Last time it had taken four days and a bad case of dehydration to get you to come back to yourself. And dehydration sucked.

Sans raised a brow as you fell down more than sat next to him into the hard wooden bench. You were going to bruise from that you just knew it. His perpetual smile fell a little as he looked at you. You didn’t blame him, you probably looked like shit, dead even, more dead than he could look. You stared blankly at the lake and just sat in silence with him. Your eyes occasionally following the pink smoke that would drift away from the monster beside you in thick wisps.

Sans continued to eye you, your detached demeanor completely new and foreign to him. He took a particularly deep drag before speaking, his tone slightly strained with the inhaled smoke.

“bad day?” You glanced over to face him fully, forcing an obviously fake smile out of habit.

“Terrible day.” Sans hummed as he exhaled, watching as your eyes followed the cloud, a very dulled curiosity in them. If you had been your normal self he had no doubt you’d be asking about it and trying to figure out exactly why it wasn’t white like usual. He could tell what it was you were going through, he went through the same thing quite often. He knew how to prod. He had no problem distracting you.

“curious about something?” You barely took any prompting to start speaking.

“Is that marijuana?” Sans raised an eyebrow, is that what it smelled like to you? That was a bit insightful.

“you think this is marijuana?” You shrugged.

“Smells like it.”

“weedn’t that be blunterful.” He snickered.

“Really?” You snorted. It slightly disappointed him that your reaction was faked but at least you were trying. Sans looked thoughtful as he took a hit, his sockets focused on the lake before turning to look at you with a smirk.

“want to try it?” You wrinkled your nose in thought and looked at the pink wrapped joint between his phalanges. The thought crossed your mind that this could be a bad idea, you’d only known each other a few weeks and all the time you had spent together you would equate to maybe a few days. Your past history had taught you accepting questionable smokes or pills from practical strangers wasn’t exactly smart. Logic was the only thing preventing you from straight up accepting it, because right now you could care less if it killed you.

 _But you did not need a repeat of Boston_.

“What is it exactly?” You questioned. Sans gave an easy shrug.

“monster pheromones.” Your eyebrows nearly went into your hair line much to the monsters amusement. That had made a twinge of surprise shoot through you.

“You’re smoking…pheromones?” Sans gave a grunt as he took a deep drag before exhaling another pink bubbly cloud. It reminded you of bubblegum and cotton candy suddenly. His eyelights watched the smoke curl as he spoke casually, your attention successfully focused on him.

“yeah, could say it’s the equivalent to your human weed. your plant though doesn’t really work on us monsters. something to do with needing to be more matter than magic.” You eyed his joint still securely in his grip.

“It’s not going to like kill me or anything right?” Sans chocked and bent over as he laughed, pink smoke shooting out his teeth and nasal cavity as he belted out his throaty humor. Your face flushed as he slowly sat back up and smiled at you. You were slowly starting to feel the numbness fade as Sans continued to speak to you, as evidenced by the damn embarrassment that decided to make itself known.

“as grave as that would be I doubt it’s harmful to you.” You stared at his sincere expression as if searching for any hint of doubt or deception. Sans noticed, his smile falling just slightly. He could see the guardedness, the telltale signs of experienced fallout filtering through your measuring look. He wondered silently what your hang ups were in comparison to his.

You grinned broadly at him, the action making him smile in turn as an actual emotion spilled onto your face. That was better. That was the easygoing human he was getting to know.

“Ok, sure! I’ll throw you a bone and trust you on that.” He snorted at your sad attempt at a pun before digging his hand around in his pocket. You watched him pullout a thick looking phone, it looked like one of those old fashioned phones from the previous century. But it was clearly modern as he had a glass screen display that lit up. You tilted your head curiously and looked at him in confusion as he messed with it.

“What’s that for?” Sans took another hit as he scrolled on his screen.

“music, it’ll help keep you calm. pheromones can be pretty intense for first timers. don’t need you freaking out or anything…it’ll be a real buzz kill if you do.” You would’ve been offended but that was the same thought process you used yourself for first timers.

“I thought it was similar to weed, why would I freak out?” Sans exhaled with a chuckle, not once looking up from his phone.

“your body is different from mine, there’s no guarantee it’ll give you the same effect exactly like it does me. besides this is tailored specifically for me so chances you will react predictably are lower.” Now you were beginning to feel like an experiment. Had humans even had this stuff before? One thing he said did stand out though.

“Specifically for you, like medicine?” Sans briefly hesitated in his scrolling for a moment before continuing, the motion so subtle you would’ve missed it if you hadn’t been focused on him.

“you could say that.” You felt kind of bad suddenly; if that was his medicine you really had no right to smoke off of it. But before you could say anything he smirked as he hit play on a song and pushed it into repeat. He looked at you and held up the joint he was holding, the look in his eyelights slightly excited. Yep you were definitely about to be experimented on. That should’ve worried you but the way he spoke made you even more interested.

“this is called an a12; appeasement pheromone 12 percent. the rest of its make up is just everyday general pheromones that don’t really do anything but help bolster the appeasement’s effects.” You watched as he then held it out to you. That was a good sign; the people in your past had never explained what it was you were taking before. It was comforting, even though you still felt like a test subject. You took it and hesitated just to comment as you recognized the song.

“Blue October? Really?” You teased, this song was old. He looked at you in mock offence.

“hey now, into the ocean is a good one. don’t be so _salty_.” You snorted and then took a hit. 

It wasn’t like weed. 

At. 

All. 

If anything it was like acid but gentle, splashing the world in a shade of vibrant maroon.

It was like a warm blanket surrounding you, engulfing your entire being and slowly shifting into a clear pink bubble that gently floated you down. Mid way to the ground the bubble popped and you drifted slowly through the air until the bench you’d been sitting on came flying to catch you, depositing you back next to Sans. You looked at him wide eyed as you both floated across a land of forests and a bright blue ocean.

“Are you seeing this?” He chuckled as his eyelights panned over to see a waterspout formed upwards from beneath the both of you, its blue water turning pink as it flew away and up; coming to fall like a light drizzle across you, the feeling cooling and electing a sigh from you. 

The song Sans had been playing grew loud, almost blaring as the bench you both sat on suddenly popped dropping you both towards the water below. You would’ve screamed normally but it made you giddy, there was nothing but peace as you broke the surface of the ocean, the water warm and inviting.

You opened your eyes and gasped, you were floating through a literal sea of stars! The bright gaseous orbs of lights passed gently by and around you giving warm soft brushes with their intense heat, the water surrounding them whirling beautifully like solidified crystal cages. It would have stolen your breath and drowned you.

But.

You felt no need to breathe and giggled as Sans swam around you on his back, his legs kicking lazily as the water rumpled his hoodie and clothing. You made a noise of surprise as he lightly batted a star over towards you, your reaction making his smile go wider. Slowly he leaned upright and gestured towards the surface as he took your hand. Bones could feel warm? You both swam up and broke the surface only to fall through a sea of clouds, your hands interlocked like a pair of skydivers as the wind whipped softly past you.

“This is amazing!” You cried out earning an easy going grin from the monster that fell across from you, his deep baritone humming along to the music. Just as the world below you came up to catch you Sans curled around you and pulled you to his chest as he began to back paddle through the clouds, the sky shifted in a dizzying wave back to water. You balanced atop his chest looking at his closed sockets as he drifted through the enchanted sea, a feeling of peace and joy running through your mind that sent a pleasant shiver along your body.

You glanced down and gasped as you saw multiple schools of fish swimming below, many of them shifting into merpeople as they swam and danced together. You looked back at Sans who was still contently swimming and laid your head on his chest, enjoying the motion of his lazy kicking through the water as his head floated on his cupped hands. 

Slowly the music was beginning to fade and Sans wrapped an arm around you as he sat up into a seated position, the world ran like paint as it washed away and the next thing you knew you were back on the bench, snuggled up to Sans side with his arm lazily settled around your waist. 

You blinked as you mind registered the world and glanced up at him. Sans started to snicker.

“enjoy yourself?” You were speechless as you tried to gather your thoughts.

“What just _happened_?” Sans casually withdrew his arm and laid it against the back of the bench, his body loose and relaxed. You oddly felt the same way he was acting; you had never had such an exciting but calming trip before in your life. You felt light and happy, your previous thoughts and problems a mere whisper that couldn’t faze you.

“first trips always a doozy. here take another hit.” You took his suggestion and pulled the joint from him to your mouth. This time you were still in the here and now but your mind thought vaguely back on how the ocean had felt, the majesty you’d felt at the swirling waterspout, and the peace you’d had upon Sans chest as he’d swam you both contently through the water. It was all like a powerful echo that resurged the emotions through you without actually plunging you under.

“But you were there with me?” You couldn’t keep the smile from forcing a permanent place on your face as you looked at him awed.

“as a monster and the fact you're taking something tailored for me, I was able to feel the intent you received from the pheromones. Riding that intent I was able to experience your trip.” He explained casually. You looked down and pulled out your phone. That trip had lasted at most five minutes when you did the math. You looked back up at him full of excitement like a kid in a candy store.

“Can we do this again?” Sans raised a brow as he looked at you in contemplation before shrugging. 

“tell you what, I have twelve more of these to try, different pheromones and doses. if you want I guess we can make a game of this. do these together.” Sans suggested with a smile.

“Are you serious?” You really wanted him to be. This had been amazing and you wanted to try more, experience more. 

He could see the hopefulness in your eyes like a beacon. What would it hurt? Hell he couldn’t let his smoking buddy get down like you had been earlier. You were alright for a human, decent. Besides he actually looked forward to spending time with you, you were the one person he didn’t have to worry about prodding him.

“yeah, hell you’re hilarious to. your face when we were free falling was the best thing I’d seen in a while.” You snorted at his teasing.

“Glad to be a big joke to you.” He chuckled. You smiled warmly, your previous bad mood long gone and replaced with the most contentment you’d felt in…years.

“I wouldn’t mind doing this with you.” He smirked. Of course you wouldn’t.

“really?” He asked taking the last drag of the joint before tossing the burnt tip perfectly into the trashcan across the way. You looked at him, watching him exhale and wondering how you got so lucky to make such a friend. Especially with such good aim.

“Really, you’re one hell of a guy Sans Skeleton.” You couldn’t help the laugh that slipped out as a small blue ethereal blush flared across his face. It was utterly adorable. Bones could blush, gladly noted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't do drugs kids, and don't take pheromones either.
> 
> Also I don't speak from personal experience when it comes to the effects this fic describes.  
> But I have friends who have been kind enough to educate me!
> 
> Hope you enjoyed the chapter!


	4. The Power of Language

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 80 Kudos...Wow guys UGH <3
> 
> I'm happy that this story is getting so much love!
> 
> And I'm even happier that you guys are enjoying it!! XD

“Sign the form Mark.” You repeated for the fifth time. Your valued coworker looked up at you with his face still set in a stubborn frown, his greased and slackened hair swinging like it was wet. You had finally managed to lure him to the rehab center after fooling him into thinking you had agreed to a date for the movies. Underhanded yes but frankly you were tired of his shit. He refused constant help and just made the job harder as he kept forgetting and all around spacing on his tasks. Not to mention you had finally noticed his shirt was baggier than normal. You were willing to bet your bad habit that he wasn’t even eating.

“No.” He hissed, his yellowing teeth bared aggressively. What, did he think he would scare you by acting like a dog? Well good thing you had volunteered at the shelter regularly while you were younger, this whole aggressive act wasn’t going to work. The biting might if he fully committed to the part, but not grant the results he so clearly wanted. Ok maybe what he wanted a little.

“Sign the form Mark.” You repeated as you waved it for emphasis. He resigned himself to looking away from you. His dried lips turning ever more downward the more annoyed he grew. You probably should’ve offered the poor man some chap stick, because the way he kept licking them was making your own ache. With a sigh you plopped down in the chair next to him, your leg bouncing the clipboard the form was on. Trying to convince a junkie they needed help was never easy. You knew that from personal experience. Sometimes all you could do…was guilt them. And you had the perfect guilt material to use on him. Not that you wanted to but hurt feeling were a damn sight better than a dead body.

“I don’t get it, you were a good guy. Cute to, with the way your hair would bounce and the way your brown eyes twinkled.” You admitted. Mark was quite.

“Were?” He asked with a side long glance. You nodded.

“Were. You don’t act and look nothing close to that now. But you could again.” He turned to fully face you, his expression weak and venerable. You didn’t like that look, it reminded you of too many things, things you spent ages trying to forget.

“But not cute enough for you to date right?” _Fuck_. So this _was_ partially because of you. You could already hear the oncoming nightmares you were sure to have for the next week or two. You smiled as best you could and took his clammy hand to give it a light squeeze. Wow that was a lot of sweat. You could probably fill the grand canyon with all of the sweat he was producing.

“You and I were never going to happen Mark. We’re too different.” He looked struck and glanced down as his free hand came up to scratch at an unseen itch on his neck. You hated the crawlies, how no matter how much you scratched they just never went away, only getting worse as your paranoia grew. You didn’t want to relive that sensation again. You gave another squeeze to draw his attention back to you.

“But just because you and I can’t be a thing, doesn’t mean you can’t find _someone_. And honestly Mark, you’re not going to find anyone like this. Not anyone _worth_ it anyways.” You watched as he slowly broke down, the tears at first dry and slow from dehydration before finally some of the salty liquid began to rush down his face. You let him bawl and then slowly held up the form to him. He looked at it with a shudder and then back to you. Like he was scared he was signing his soul away. When in truth he was saving it.

“Sign the form Mark, for me but most of all for you. Your life isn’t worth wasting.” It was nerve wracking almost how he released your hand and reached for it with the slowness of a snail trying to outrun a fire. You even held your breath as he sloppily scrawled his name at the bottom. With a sigh of relief, because thank lord that shit show was over, you stood and helped him to his feet.

“I’ll be back to pick you up in four months. Everything’s going to be fine.” You reassured him as the nurse finally walked over from behind her desk to take the form from you. You were caught off guard as Mark pulled you into an embrace, your body tensing for a second before relaxing. You hugged him back and tried to ignore the strong stench of BO coming off of him. Geez he needed a shower! You were probably going to need one now to…you were _definitely_ going to need one. You continued to smile as he released you with mumbled thanks and didn’t leave the lobby till he vanished into the back with the nurse.

 _A flash of the same scene playing through your mind but with way more struggling and an armed police escort. Green eyes glaring at you as shouting echoed; betrayal and fury rampant in his glare as his teeth gnashed and gritted. You had never seen such a strong urge to kill and maim than that look that he shot at you._

You blinked. Great, the flashbacks were back. Thank you Mark for unknowingly traumatizing you enough to relive one of the most frightening moments of your life. You stared at where he had disappeared, swallowing dryly in a brief jolt of sick nostalgia. You hadn’t messed up again, had you?

You needed a cigarette. 

Stepping out of the building you looked up and down the street trying to see if there were any local smoking areas nearby. With a huff you realized of course there wasn’t, you just couldn’t get that lucky could you? Resigned you went and got back into your car, secretly cursing the city’s anti-smoking law inside of vehicles. 

It was your fucking car; you had paid for it so really what the hell city council? It took you another twenty minutes before you laid eyes on one of the lesser taken care of parks. The trees were slightly withered and the grass patchy in certain areas, but those thoughts didn’t matter en lieu of a smoker sign placed at the parks edge. Victory!

You were quick to find a parking spot and even quicker to power walk into the park, tracing the sidewalk in order to find an appropriate place to sit. It was sad really, maybe once upon a time this sidewalk would’ve guided you through a beautiful lining of trees and plump green bushes but now it was like walking through an abandoned sanctuary that nature couldn’t even bother reclaiming. Bare tree limbs and half destroyed bushes limply existing. The life looked utterly drained here. That’s why you stopped briefly as a small gaggle of giggling sounds came from further up ahead.

Were there children here? That was crazy to think about; with how creepy this park looked you’d never allow children of yours to come here. Then again you didn’t have children so what did you know. You followed the sound for the hell of it, and to be sure the little things was really with parents and not lost. You stopped finally and your eyebrows rose in surprise. 

There was a playground filled with children, their parents all standing and sitting around watching their little tykes play and tumble. The equipment looked well maintained which was confusing. Honestly the city couldn’t be bothered to water the trees but were fine spending the polish on playground equipment?

“that’ll be five dollars.” That baritone! You quickly looked around and smiled as your eyes landed on the familiar monster currently situated behind a food cart. He sold hotdogs? The nerve of him not telling you, you both could’ve been snacking while you hung out! Grinning like the Cheshire cat you carefully snuck along the treeline, watching to make sure he didn’t notice you as he received his payment from a tall brunette. 

He looked so bored as he helped the next customer in line. You hadn’t been aware that he could fully close his mouth with the way his expression was set in a frown. That was going to change; you were going to see those big pearly whites even if it killed you. 

Wait, if he could close his mouth why did he use his teeth to hold his cigarettes? That question was going to bother you for the foreseeable future. You waited for the final person to leave and waited a bit longer as Sans sat back in his chair, his skull resting on his closed fist as he watched the children making havoc. 

Very carefully you circled around him and came up on his left, just enough to be movement in his peripheral if he was paying attention, which he wasn’t. You stopped just short enough that you could’ve grabbed the handle of his cart and smirked. Carefully you leaned in and lowered your voice teasingly.

“Did you see the movie about the hotdog?” You droned forcing your voice to sound like a movie villain and ignoring how he tensed right before he turned around to face you. For a moment he looked disturbed maybe a little frightened and then his sockets widened as you finished your joke.

“It was an Oscar wiener.” You snickered. Sans stared at you blankly and you feared you had broken him. Could you scare a monster to death? He was still here, no dust in sight. It took another moment before he finally snorted, his frown going wide into that big smile you had come to enjoy. 

“wow, of all the hotdog jokes you picked that one?” He asked visibly relaxing. You looked at him in false hurt, your cheeks puffing out into a pout.

“Hey, I spent hours thinking of that one!” Sans playfully rolled his sockets.

“hate to break it to you but someone beat you to it in the last century. could say that joke’s a little _stale_.” You chuckled only making his grin go wider at the corners.

“So hotdogs huh?” He smirked.

“’dogs.” You raised an eyebrow humorously.

“That’s what I said, hotdogs.” He tapped the cart as his sockets narrowed mischievously.

“they’re not hotdogs.” Ok this time you finally frowned. You looked over at the small rotating grill curiously. They were round like hotdogs, even that familiar red from when one would cook. And they certainly _smelled_ like hotdogs. If it looked and smelled like a hotdog, it _had_ to be a hotdog. 

Sans chuckled as he watched you struggle to wrap your mind around his words versus what you were actually looking at. With practiced precision he easy snatched up a bun, flipped his tongs into the air just to be funny, and then picked one of the dogs up to place into the bread before handing it to you. You took it and stared at it.

“I’ll be real here, this is very much like a hotdog.” He shrugged.

“this coming from the person who thought I was smoking weed and not pheromones the other day.” You frowned.

“It smelled like it was!” You cried defensively trying your best not to blush from the slip. You failed. You were blushing brighter than a Christmas light. Sans found it adorable. He waved towards the food and just sat there waiting patiently for you to try it. You took a bite.

It was _not_ a hotdog.

“What is this?” You asked. It tasted rather good, savory with a hint of spice to it. You were caught off guard by how it seemed to vanish mid swallow but quickly recovered. So this was what eating magic food was like. Sans had to be making a killing. There wasn’t really a way to get this type of food without traveling a fair distance.

“like it do ya? it’s a water sausage. you humans call it vegan.” You snorted.

“Looking out for my health huh?” Sans snickered.

“my pocket more likely.” His eyelights shifted to the side before flickering back to you, his smile casual.

“that’ll be six bucks.” Instinctively you reached for your wallet and extracted the money. It was a bit pricey but then again most vegan stuff was, seemed fair to you. You held it out to him but tilted your head in confusion when he didn’t take it. His sockets crinkled into ovals.

“said bucks, those are lacking some horns.” You nearly dropped your dog as you broke into unabashed laughter, missing the faint blush that flashed briefly across his face. Damn you had a cute laugh. Sans watched as you put your wallet away and continued to eat, his eyelights focusing on his cart thoughtfully before looking back at you. He was slightly hesitant, his tone unusually soft.

“you want to go somewhere?” You stopped chewing the final bite of your food and looked at him oddly. He seemed slightly out of character and did he mean what you thought he meant? How would that even work exactly? And wow you were seriously considering it. 

Way to go you, turn down countless people you know can do the deed but stop to think about accepting a skeleton into your bed. A friendly and slightly charming skeleton. Did he have sensitive bones or something? Was it a magic thing? Damn your human biology because you sure as hell were blushing again. Sans blushed in return, once more seeming to read your thoughts.

“i have a new pheromone to try.” He clarified. Oh! Well that didn’t help the existential crisis you had just put yourself through but it was nice to know you simply misunderstood. Kind of. You smiled trying to break the sudden awkwardness.

“I’d like that actually.” Sans stood and raised a brow, his blush fading.

“another bad day?” You shrugged.

“Better now that I ran into you.” He chuckled as he put a sign up on his cart; a simple button press making it fold in on itself and lock into place. That was some high tech stuff for a basic food cart. He held a hand out to you with a sly grin. You eyed his hand and looked up at him.

“Ok I’m getting a lot of mixed signals here.” He looked at you innocently.

“easy, I’m not taking you to the bonezone. I just know a shortcut to the park we smoke at.” And yep your face was once more flushed.

“Did you just refer to sex as the bonezone?” You deadpanned. He looked at you curiously as if assessing you before smirking.

“you were thinking about sex with me?” Nope! You were not answering that! You took his hand and pointedly looked away from him. Yep his hand was warm just like how you’d imagined on your trip, and it had a bit of give to it despite how hard his phalanges still felt. He chuckled and you realized you had been staring at it. Sans winked.

“hold your breath.” You were about to ask why when you felt a sudden falling sensation and then nothingness. The world came back in a flash of color and you were left gasping for air. That had been terrifying! You vaguely felt Sans patting you on the back as you panted, your lungs burning slightly.

“told you to hold your breath.” Better warning could have been given but you relented that he did in fact say that. When you finally calmed down you looked at him in shock.

“You can teleport?!” 

“On occasion.” He admitted as he sauntered over to the familiar bench and took his usual seat. That explained those times it had felt like he had suddenly appeared out of nowhere. Because he had. The dude was freaking jumper! With a new found respect you went and sat beside him, his eyelights glancing at you curiously as he pulled out a green colored joint. Green. Ok this had to be another poke at your marijuana assumption.

Sans shrugged as he placed the stick between his teeth and lit it, his eyelights diffusing slightly as he took a large inhale. His body seemed to sag and his skull tilted as he exhaled an emerald green cloud of smoke. The vibrancy of it making you gasp. If there was one thing you were starting to love about these pheromones other than how they made you feel it was how colorful they were. Was that pine you smelled? Sans with an unnatural slowness plucked the joint from his teeth and held it out to you.

“T10, thoughtfulness 10 percent.” He slurred, his tone almost drunk sounding. You giggled as you took it. He was interesting to watch on a first trip. Though you wondered how he was even able to talk when you had been so absorbed the first time you’d tried a pheromone.

“What no music this time?” He grinned sleepily.

“there’s music. wanna hear it?” Before you could respond he took back the joint and took a deep breath. You froze as one of his hands came up to cup your chin and his mouth stopped inches from yours. You felt your heart slam in your chest as his breath and hints of the emerald smoke brushed you.

“breathe deep.” He whispered. You shut your eyes as you felt his teeth nearly brush your lips, a gust of hot breath and scented pine flooding your senses as you inhaled. 

You slowly opened your eyes as the world became fuzzy around the edges, Sans face pulling back with a smirk as you both sat at the edge of a beach. Music was playing, specifically blue oyster cult’s don’t fear the reaper. Another old track? You followed Sans gaze as he looked downwards, a lone ant crawling in the sand with a leaf upon it’s back.

It was heavy, but the queen would be pleased that you were bringing back something so large for the colony. Your little legs straining under the effort until a large gust hit, ripping you away from the ants grip. You twirled and spun in the gale’s hold, another leaf coming to join and dance around you as you both landed on the surface of the ocean.

You were a single drop among many, coalescing to become something whole and complete. Another drop brushed against you in greeting, the both of you melting together and diffusing into the wider being that surrounded you. The water churned and suddenly you were swimming with such ferocity in pursuit of the smaller fish, the cycle of life reverberating as you swallowed it whole. 

You fell into darkness, the cold and comforting feel of it almost lulling. Sans reached out and took your hand, his bones shifting and blending in and out of the darkness around you as light spilled from them. 

Magic. 

It reached out and engulfed you, your body becoming numb but your mind sharper as the darkness chipped away and flaked, a rush of sky shooting passed you as you flew through it. Your eyes widened as the sky turned crystalline the clouds weaving in and out as the ages and the stages of life reflected off the glass like surfaces. 

You were seeing time made manifest. 

You reached out for it but started to fall again. You turned and saw Sans falling inches from and just beneath you. He chuckled as he brought up what looked like a marble that then exploded into an infinitely large display of the solar system. Planets groaning and straining as they turned on their axis’s, their sounds like the voices of angles long dormant and unable to be vocalized.

You shot passed them as Sans took hold of your hand, your trail of light burning brightly behind you as the both of you circled around Saturn. Your fiery hand reaching out and brushing the comet built rings. Sans pulled you flush to him as you both began to slowly cool, the fire that had warmed you turning to a chill as you began to float aimlessly.

“told you there was music.” He muttered. You blinked and you were both back on the bench. You took a shaky breath of air and grinned at him. He was taking another hit as you poked his arm making him chuckle.

“That didn’t feel like…like it was me.” You stated. Some of the things you had witnessed weren’t things you thought you had ever contemplated before. Time as a physical manifestation, water as a hybrid of small inconsequential droplets that added up to its vastness, and the way the planets had echoed and sounded. 

But most of all the music.

“that’s because that was me.” He grinned. You raised a brow at him, you knew you wouldn't have picked such an old song!

“when I exchanged smoke with you I pushed _my_ intent. the pheromone made you receptive to it and you were able to go along with me. heh, i've been learning a lot since starting this game with you.” He stated absently as he offered you the joint. You inhaled and felt your thoughts wander as you looked at him. The magic and dust that made up his body felt so solid, just like your body of flesh did but his seemed more natural, more innate. Looking at him closely he seemed closer to the baseness of nature than you as a person did—

You looked down at the smoke resting between your fingers.

“Did this just turn me into…a scholar?” You asked in befuddlement.

“depends, for what is a scholar but a man lost and seeking the simplest of answers? Et ipsa scientia potestas est.” You blinked. Not only had that been uncharacteristically deep coming from your skeleton friend but it had also gone off from the English language.

“Was that latin?” He yawned lazily as he slouched down into the back of the bench.

“多分” You narrowed your eyes. That was definitely Japanese. Ok that was two different languages he had just used and it wasn’t possible for them to be side effects from the pheromone because you felt no inclination to speak greek or any other language. At least you didn't think you did. You thought about Spanish and realized you still didn't know it. Yep it had to be him.

“How many languages do you know?” You asked in shock and amusement. Sans closed his sockets as he took back the joint and placed it between his teeth.

“human languages? five.” You snorted.

“What are you some kind of scientist or something?” Sans sockets opened wide as he glanced at you his smile tentative.

“used to be.” You stared at him waiting for a punch line. It wasn’t coming, he was silent and staring at you in observance. Was he really serious? You just saw him selling vegan hotdogs a bit ago why would a scientist be doing that? This had to be a really elaborate joke. But he wasn’t laughing or even popping a pun. Your eyebrows rose up to your hairline.

“You’re not joking.” Sans seemed to relax as he blew out another cloud of smoke. You didn’t seem put off and you weren’t looking ready to shoot him a million questions about his old job. He knew there was a reason he was starting to like you.

“yep.” Sans said smugly popping the p in his answer.

You laughed.

“So you’re a _scientist_ and know _five_ different languages.” You rolled your eyes as he nodded.

“ _doub_ t me?” Not really, but you weren’t going to admit that. You secretly wanted him to show off. You were enjoying learning about him.

“A little.” You teased. He smiled as he drew another toke of the lit joint, smoke gently flowing out between his teeth and the top of his shirt. The color of the smoke as it escaped gave a mystical vibe to the skeleton that had your ears burning. If you were an artist you would’ve been painting the image. You wondered what it would look like if he smoked shirtless.

“fun fact time, did you know we weren’t always called monsters?” That peaked your curiosity. Sans chucked at your reaction, a wistful look coming on his face.

“we’re known for our compassion, it’s one of the biggest components in a monster soul. a few thousand years ago you humans knew that, before the war broke out. hell, it was you who named us. we were more in touch with nature and magic back then, never really had a reason to name anything. monsters didn’t need to establish identities via words, we could just tune in with those around us and we’d know each other through our resonance.” You frowned. That word resonance really stuck out to you for some reason. He continued.

“you humans though couldn’t really feel that, unless you were a mage which was even rarer. anyways want to guess what you named us?” Sans said with a smirk as he passed the joint to you. That was a lot to take in rather quickly and your mind was still racing for questions to ask but his sudden eagerness to explain things made you hold back.

“I wouldn’t have a clue where to even start.” You answered honestly as you took the offered pheromone and drew a breath as Sans exhaled a billowing green cloud.

“well, you guys spoke a _lot_ of latin back then.”

“So that’s how’d you’d know it!” He chuckled as you scrunched your face up in thought.

“Wait…how old would that make you Sans?” He made a face. You tried not to laugh. _Holy shit_ Sans was an old man! 

But he acted close to your age…you felt your head start to hurt as you contemplated briefly the nuances of age verses youth. Sans snapped his fingers dispelling you from your thoughts.

“not the _point_ of the conversation,” Sans teased as he reached over and took back the joint. “anyways, in a bit of irony you named us after our Souls, which back then you sorta revered to a point. even considered us purer than the whole human race...heh quickly changed ya’lls opinions once you learned we could interact with your souls. Misericordia…that’s what you called us. mercy, perfect considering what we're made of at our cores. over the years it broke down into Spanish, monstrous…then of course English what with its absolute butchering and slang, heh well ya get it.” You frowned.

“Wait…weren’t you underground that whole time? How do you know the way your name evolved?” Sans looked at the ground briefly, his tone going low and bitter despite the forced lightness he tried to use.

“because it happened the same underground, just quicker. you trap a nation of differently speaking monsters together things happen like a domino effect, also all the stuff that would drift down to us via garbage and run off. wasn’t too hard to keep up culturally.” They learned everything by digging around in the trash? You didn’t remember learning about this from the news or anything. It was sad, and depressing. You remembered when you had done that, though you had been digging for food, sometimes burying into a huddle of garbage just for a night’s rest. It was humiliating…degrading. You barely felt human sometimes.

“I’m sorry.” You whispered. Sans looked at you in confusion before recognition flared onto his face. He shook his head and smiled weakly.

“nothing to be sympathetic about. everyone underground did it, it wasn’t something shameful.” Yeah but they wouldn’t have had to do that in the first place if humans hadn’t trapped them to begin with. You wanted to say that, wanted to point it out but the way Sans was looking at you made you swallow your words. He didn’t need to be reminded of that. You both silently looked at each other, your expressions calm and accepting. He finally grunted as he inhaled and then blew a thick cloud, a light blue outline surrounding it and forming it into a boat shape.

“What—“ You giggled as it suddenly sailed around your head, the ship shifting up and down as it went along like it was in a real sea. Sans watched you as you poked at it and it responded by shifting and nearly toppling over upside down. You looked at him bright eyed. He grunted again and you watched as it went up like costing a wave before falling back down and dispersing into a ring of smoke. The imaginary sea taking it to its depths. That had been beautiful and amazing. There was literally no end to the surprises Sans kept throwing at you.

“How did you do that? And don’t say magic!” You said quickly. He smiled mischievously.

“sūmō dzūbatsō? heh.” You blinked. Was that another language? You hadn’t heard that particular one before. Sure there were hundreds you’d never heard before but this one sounded…inhuman to put it lightly and fantastical. Its what you imagined real elven language would’ve sounded like if it had been naturally developed. 

“ID which converts sunlight particles into our souls magic, we then absorb it through our breathing.” Sans said as if explaining a strawberry was a fruit. Which was a bad metaphor because you still couldn’t comprehend what exactly he was saying.

“ID? Wait…what did you say before that?” Sans laughed.

“i questioned why you humans always needed to rationalize everything.” You shook your head.

“No, the way you spoke, was that another language?” Sans was pleased that you were so excited about something he considered normal. It spoke volumes about your cultural acceptance. And he wouldn’t admit it but it tickled something inside of him to.

“J́achyāaj́a, monster language.”

“You have your own language!?” Sans snorted.

“duh. another thing from being underground. culminating various languages not only evolves them but makes new ones. guess you could say it’s a mix of every language almost.” He said dismissively. How he acted so casual about it threw you for a loop. That was a big deal! It was like one gigantic language cipher if it was built from almost every language! How did he not see the potential in that!?

“anyways the ID, not the acronym, is the unexplained force that focuses sunlight and condenses it down to its purest form. this form is what we call magic, it suffuses straight into a monsters soul. for some reason though you humans have a difficult time absorbing it, probably the traces of determination within you.” He had started partially muttering to himself as if contemplating his words. He had lost you. Determination? Souls? You hadn’t been prepared for such a topic.

“mages have been known to have almost no determination whatsoever, just high amounts of perseverance, which is great for magic conducting.” Even with that big explanation you still couldn’t understand what he said. So you were left with two options, act like you weren’t an idiot and get caught later if he decided to quiz you, or simply admit that you were an idiot and take the teasing now like a champ.

“I have no idea what you just said…sounded deep though.” You tried to brush it off casually with a shrug. Sans rolled his sockets with a smirk.

“didn’t expect you to tsūxa. why do you think I told you all of that so easily?” Ouch, where was the trust? You glared and he chuckled. That unfair tease! Wait what did he call you?

“Sue ye?” Sans tilted his head in amusement.

“tsūxa, means human.” It was a basic word but the way it sounded made you smile against your will, even sent a small shiver of pleasure through your body.

“I…actually like how it sounds. Kind of basic but it sounds kind of sweet. Don’t think I’d mind you calling me that regularly.” Sans chocked on the joint caught off guard by your words, a deep cyan blush dusting his cheeks. He may have been able to tease you, but you were the queen of flustering. To bad you weren't aware of what you had just given him permission to do culturally. But he certainly wasn't going to make it awkward by pointing it out.

“um…” Sans started as he tried to compose himself. “we better get going, it’s getting late.” Was it? You pulled out your phone and cursed. It was almost seven, and you hadn’t gotten dinner supplies yet. Sans watched the emotions run across your face but didn’t comment right away. It took him a moment to consider the ramifications of what he was about to offer before he spoke.

“you uh, want to come over to my place for dinner?” How you perked up at the idea made him have to suppress a reaction. He was right you had been worried about eating tonight. Drawing that conclusion had been easy, you barely kept your cigarettes well stocked so it was a safe bet you didn’t keep your pantry full either. You had to be a buy as you go type of person.

“If you’re ok with it?” You asked slowly. He smirked.

“sure, think my bro would love to meet you.” You froze.

“You have a brother?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sans  
> Latin: Knowledge is power  
> Japanese: Perhaps


	5. Dinner time?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 117 kudos?! OMG XD
> 
> Sorry for the delayed update but life is...  
> getting complicated right now >_>
> 
> Hope you enjoy!

That was **not** spaghetti. You blinked as a congealed bubble slowly rose up from beneath the hardened volcanic crust that you presumed had been the noodles at one point, and watched as it slowly inched it’s way bigger before bursting with an audible pop. Even the pop sounded wet and mushy. This thing had to be alive! There was no way it wasn’t with how it shifted when you poked at it with a fork. It vaguely reminded you of that gruesome image from your childhood when a squirrel had been stupid enough to get caught on your uncles electric fence.

Papyrus was staring at you expectantly, his sockets slowly glancing over at Sans who somehow for the life of you was shoving a fork full of the rancid concoction down his void of a mouth. You were too stunned by the dish in front of you to even gawk at your bony friend and marvel that his mouth could indeed open. Which was a crime! You would’ve had jokes about it for months! But nope. You were too hypnotized at the atrocity that was his brother’s cooking.

When you had both shown up at the cozy abode that was Sans house you had expected a similar heightened skeleton just like him with matching eyelights and a wide grin. Instead a behemoth of a monster had come waltzing out of a smoking kitchen dress in a blazing orange apron that looked like it had been smeared in charcoal while attempting to cover a cartoonish set of armor. 

It was cute.

You found the colossal monster currently trying to poison you as cute.

Could you fake a pasta allergy? Did that even _count_ as pasta anymore? You slowly looked up to Papyrus who perked up slightly, his smile brightening in question. You went to clear your throat and prepared to make some kind of excuse but Sans was quick to cut you off.

“go on buddy, you haven’t tried your food yet.” He commented casually with one socket closed in amusement, his plate barren and dry as the desert. Was he going to die from that? Did monsters have some kind of evolutionary digestive system that wasn’t fazed by bio organic poison? Were _you_ going to die? You were sad. You thought you were friends. Sans chuckled making you blush in embarrassment. 

He knew you were suffering right now, you could tell he knew by the way his sockets crinkled. You were caught between a rock and a hard place. You could eat and then promptly kill over, or you could be honest and risk never getting another cigarette on Thursdays ever again let alone completing your game with Sans. 

Slowly you picked up your fork and went to stab into it. The hardened crust which you expected to resist like it was the grand hope diamond…flaked. Like it was fucking dandruff. You were going to die before you even got it to your mouth. You glanced at the skeleton brothers who were staring you down intensely and then forced yourself to finish scooping the ‘food’ onto your fork. You lifted it to your lips and bristled. It smelled like molded cardboard. Please don’t let there be cardboard.

You shot Sans a glare to which he only shrugged and then bravely shoved the forkful into your mouth, hastily pulling the silverware out before you could back down and remove the living death you had just taken a bite of. You chewed and then frowned. It was…different. It had flavor, not that you could place it but it did. How the hell did it have flavor? You chewed some more before reluctantly swallowing. It went down smoothly and didn’t try to latch onto your throat and suffocate you. You could possibly eat this completely. You took another bite and Papyrus ‘Nye hehe’d’ excitedly.

“I SEE YOU LIKE IT Y/N!” You didn’t like it or hate it. You simply smiled and kept eating, determined to get it all gone and down so this weird in-between of torture and confusion could end. You got about half way through it when Papyrus stood and returned with second helpings for Sans, the shorter brother gladly picking up his fork and digging into it. Dear lord why would he want more? 

“SO SANS TELLS ME YOU WORK AT A CONVENIENT STORE. HOW DO YOU LIKE IT THERE?” You stopped to answer only pausing briefly to wonder…did you ever tell Sans about where you worked? Out of all the talks you’d had you couldn’t remember bringing it up. Could it have been while you were smoking the pheromones? But you remembered being very lucid under the effects. Oh well you could just ask Sans about it after you supposed.

“It’s ok, the clientele could be better but the hours are nice.” Papyrus hummed as you took another gelatinous forkful and chewed. This time you did catch Sans taking a bite and your eyes went wide as you caught a brief flash of blue. Did he have a fucking _tongue_!? Sans looked up from his food and caught you openly staring at him, he chuckled and winked as his _glowing_ tongue slipped out and _wrapped_ around a chunk of spaghetti before pulling it into his mouth. It was also prehensile...because why the fuck not. You almost chocked on the food that had tried to slip down your esophagus in your shock, that smug ass had made a show of _chewing_ and his teeth weren’t even _moving_ in time with his jaw _flexing_!

“YES WORKING IN RETAIL CAN BE A TEST OF ONE’S MENTAL ENDURANCE. TAKES INCREDIBLE PATIENCE FROM WHAT I’M TOLD.” Papyrus wasn’t even acknowledging his brother’s antics as he took a bite of a sandwich he made. Wait…why wasn’t he eating the living massacre to!? You tried to think of how to ask that without being offensive and you couldn’t. But you still had to know.

“W-why aren’t you eating your…cooking with us?” Sans snorted as Papyrus raised a bony brow, his grin turning into an annoyed frown.

“BECAUSE I DON’T ENJOY THE WAY MY BROTHER LIKES IT PREPARED. MY FRIEND UNDYNE TAUGHT ME A MUCH BETTER METHOD BUT SANS INSISTS THAT IT NEEDS TO BE, AS HE PUTS IT EDIBLE.” You almost dropped your fork. _THIS_ was what Papyrus considered edible!? Well you were able to eat it but your poor eyes would be forever scarred from the experience. You shot Sans a glare as he chuckled, he was enjoying your suffering way too much. Papyrus cleared his throat bringing your attention back to him.

“I AM GLAD MY BROTHER DECIDED TO FINALLY INTRODUCE US, HE’S SAID A LOT ABOUT YOU.” Your eyes shot over to Sans who was calmly finishing his second plate and then quickly back to Papyrus, your face neutral. You hoped it was all good things. You hoped he hadn’t brought up the marijuana thing because Papyrus seemed way to upright to be ok with that kind of thing.

“Has he?”

“YES, I WAS ALWAYS CURIOUS ABOUT THIS HUMAN WHO INSISTED ON STEALING HIS CIGARETTES. WHILE I DEPLORE THE HABIT AND WANT TO LECTURE YOU, I DO HAVE TO THANK YOU FOR CUTTING DOWN HIS HABIT.” You raised a brow.

“Cutting down his habit?” You vaguely heard a chocking noise from Sans but you were all eyes for Papyrus at the moment.

“YES, NOW HE ONLY SMOKES SEEMINGLY ON THURSDAY WHEN YOU BOTH MEET UP. USED TO BE HE SMOKED EVERYDAY EVEN AT HOME.” You blushed and refused to look over at Sans who was currently receiving a hard look from his sibling. Then Papyrus’s sockets seemed to soften, his smile going gentle.

“THAT’S ANOTHER THING I MUST THANK YOU FOR, HE SEEMS HAPPIER. THE DOCTOR—“

“papyrus.” Sans cut the taller monster off, the tone he used was soft but held a tightness to it. You finally looked at him and his grin looked a little strained, his eyelights jittering in his sockets as he looked at his brother. His voice dropped an octave as he slipped into J́achyāaj́a, your brows furrowing in confusion. It was like the mood had taken a one eighty, Sans smile had turned into a closed frown.

“Ĵa xiṡū ye taíburé.” Sans said as he gripped his fork a little bit tighter. Papyrus frowned, not at all pleased by whatever it was that Sans had said. He looked ready to protest as if he couldn’t understand why his sibling was acting like this.

“kí Sãns—“

“ **Údzú** nỹ xōtsā.” Sans once more cut across him, his tone darker. Papyrus huffed more in annoyance than anger. You didn’t think it would be possible for Sans to truly anger his brother but the way Papyrus was glaring at his brother who was now focused on his empty plate made you tense. You didn’t like the idea that it was you simply being there about to hear the wrong thing that made them act like this. For some reason you felt like this was out of character, even though you’d known Papyrus for all of an hour. 

Mood change!

“I told Sans earlier how much I like your language.” Papyrus stared at Sans a moment longer before looking at you and slowly smiling. Sans even grinned thankful for the subject change. Yay for the reappearance of those beautiful teeth. You hated seeing them vanish, as bizarre as that thought was. Wait were you attracted to his teeth? Dear lord next thing you knew you’d be acting like an old Victorian man and start panting at the sight of an exposed ankle bone. 

Don’t think about it.

“DO YOU? THAT’S GOOD TO HEAR, MOST HUMANS DON’T LIKE HEARING IT. SEEMS IT’S DIFFICULT TO UNDERSTAND AND SO THEY TEND TO BE…VOCAL ABOUT IT.” That made your heart twist painfully in your chest. It sounded amazing but apparently racists just had to ruin everything. You wouldn’t be surprised if there were restaurants or something banning it. You smiled brightly.

“Well I love it! Even told Sans I wouldn’t mind him calling me Suye!” Sans jumped slightly and turned so flushed he was like a lighthouse beacon. He literally tensed as Papyrus smirked, knowing full well where his brother was about to take this conversation. Stars why had he invited you over?

“Tsūxa, YOU MEAN. INTERESTING I DIDN’T KNOW YOU FELT THAT WAY ABOUT SANS. SURPRISING WITH HOW LAZY AND HOW MUCH OF A SLOB HE IS.” You stared at Papyrus. Felt that way? You looked at Sans and how bright his face was and forced the smile to hold steady on your face. It looked like Papyrus was insinuating you had a deeper interest in Sans than your relationship actually was. Maybe there was another meaning to the word you were simply missing? Though Sans's blush was ominous as hell.

“Um, does it mean something other than human?” Papyrus looked at you innocently, his smile bigger than normal. When he spoke it was smug.

“NO IT MEANS HUMAN, BUT THE FACT YOU ASKED HIM TO GIVE YOU A NICKNAME MEANS YOU ARE OPEN TO…ADVANCES. IN OTHER WORDS YOU WOULDN’T MIND HIM ATTEMPTING TO WOO YOU.” Your heart stopped. It had to of, because there was no way your lungs would stop working and your brain would shut down like it was currently doing otherwise. You numbly forced words to come out.

“How does a nickname mean…dating?”

“IN OUR CULTURE ONLY FAMILY OR PARTNERS MAY ADDRESS EACH OTHER OUTSIDE OF THEIR GIVEN NAMES, IT IMPLIES CLOSENESS AND PERSONAL FAMILIARITY. IT’S ALSO AN EASIER WAY TO RECOGNIZE WHAT FAMILY OR MONSTER CLAN YOU BELONG TO BASED ON HOW YOU’RE GREETED IN PUBLIC. FRIENDS STILL KEEP IT FORMAL BY USING GIVEN NAMES SO AS NOT TO CONFUSE OTHERS.” That was not how human society worked. At all. You had basically told Sans you were interested in him! And then implied you wanted to take it further! Combined with the bonezone joke from earlier you were feeling absolutely mortified. 

Sans though noticed, and rather than sitting there being flustered he figured it was best to get some personal revenge against you. For bringing this up in the first place. He'd never hear the end of it from Papyrus now. He forced the magic making up his blush to dissipate and then looked at you intensely, his sockets lidding and his smile twisting in such a way he knew had charmed other monsters before. If it worked on them why not on a human. 

And if your widened eyes and half opened mouth was anything to go by, it was definitely doing something.

“something wrong, _tsūxa_?” He stretched the word, his tongue slipping out to wipe along the bottom of his teeth lazily. He didn’t expect you to start stuttering, nor to end up falling sideways out of your chair in a haste to stand up. He erupted into laughter. While Papyrus quickly jumped up to help you, his sockets wide in concern. You let papyrus help you to your feet and muttered an apology. Once Papyrus was done giving you a cursory once over he sighed.

“I APOLOGIZE, SANS TAKES HIS PRANKS A BIT FAR SOMETIMES,” Oh you were all to familiar with that little factoid. “BUT WOWIE NOW I CAN THINK OF A NICKNAME TO GIVE YOU IN RETURN AS MY POTENTIAL SISTER IN LAW.” Your knees almost gave out and Papyrus was thankfully quick enough to catch you, Sans's already boisterous laughter turning into a high pitched witches cackle. You hoped he popped a rib bone! Refusing to be humiliated further you kindly pulled yourself free from Papyrus and sauntered up to Sans who was still laughing but seemed to finally settle as you approached him.

He popped his head sideways onto a fist as he looked at you with one open socket. In a flash you slammed a hand down onto the table and the other onto the back of his chair making him jump in shock. You smiled evilly. You were about to see just how many lines you could cross if any at all with your next few words. Sans read your face but didn’t get time to mentally prepare.

“Must admit you _zygote_ me right through the heart with the way you call me that, bone _daddy_. Really gets me,” you paused and popped your neck with a precise twist and sighed lewdly. “weak in the patellas.” Sans sockets went out and his entire body stilled as his entire skull went blue. You wouldn’t be able to tell it was supposed to be white if you didn’t know better. Papyrus though was slack jawed, he had bulged out eyes as he looked at the display in what you could only describe as flustered horror. Wait he had _eyes_!? You slowly stood up and noticed both the brothers were frozen, neither one saying anything let alone breathing. 

Had you gone too far? Oops.

Papyrus recovered first, his body slowly shaking and his eyes closing as he blushed a deep orange, his already loud voice coming out even louder.

“NO **FOREPLAY** IN THE KITCHEN! OR IN _FRONT_ OF ME!” Was that considered foreplay? You looked back at Sans and took a step back as his eyelights came into existence and he shot to his feet. He looked at you in a horrible mix of frustration and pride. You didn’t know how to read that. Pride probably for the clever pun usage and frustration for the…foreplay? apparently? 

“i need a minute.” Before you could say anything he popped out of the kitchen, Papyrus groaning in even more annoyance. You smiled weakly but that didn’t seem to deter or ease the monster you had been left with.

“GREAT! **MORE** SOCKS TO _FUCKING_ CLEAN!” You were thrown off by the cussing, you hadn’t pictured him saying that. But then again you had learned a lot tonight you hadn’t known or pictured before. You stopped as his words clicked in your head. Socks? What did socks have to do with anything? And why did he say that right after Sans vanished? Was Sans getting some socks? What in the world would Sans be doing—

You broke into uproarious laughter as Papyrus admonished you for your antics. Mentioning something along the lines of ‘needing more detergent’ and ‘never being soft again’. You didn’t think that’s what Sans had disappeared for but the implication left you rolling.

The rest of the night went smoother, the three of you had watched a short movie after having calmed down till Papyrus was led up to bed by Sans. You found it adorable that Sans still read bedtime stories to his brother. Personally you felt you were never to old to enjoy certain things in life. You looked up as Sans slowly moved back down the stairs about twenty minutes later and smiled at you.

“ready to go?” Yes, most definitely you were.

“Yeah, can’t wait to get home and scream into my pillow.” Sans snorted as he held his hand out to you. You eyed it a moment and then gently took it. You were surprised after all the awkwardness at dinner you still felt comfortable grabbing it. He closed his sockets playfully and then the world changed, you had held your breath this time but still got dizzy. You looked over to your car and smiled thankfully as you let go of his hand.

“Seriously thanks for inviting me over.” He shrugged.

“fahgettaboudit.” You snorted.

“Was that a Brooklyn accent?” His sockets ovaled mischievously.

“Wha’ yous likes it or sumtin’?” You laughed and then shook your head as you looked at him. His smile was soft as he returned your stare.

“I’m sorry, about earlier.” You blabbed. He raised a brow in silent question.

“I didn’t know nicknames were such a big deal to you guys.”

“Aren’t they to you?”

“Not to that degree,” You rolled your eyes playfully. “Humans are lax about it, we used them for casual affection even with friends.” Sans looked thoughtful for a second.

“you consider us friends?” You looked at him in confusion. He looked serious as he looked at you, his face a neutral smile close to how you’d first met him and bummed off of him.

“Well you invited me to dinner? I don’t know a single human that would invite anyone less than a friend over other than for business purposes. Are monsters more open than that?” Sans tilted his head.

“it’s just being polite, we don’t see a reason not to share food or be hospitable to each other. even strangers who come across decent. you humans even did that back in the day.” You frowned.

“That sounds dangerous, you never know what someone could be thinking.” Sans smirked.

“you’d be surprised how easily monsters can feel intent. intentions mean everything to us monsters as well as the magic behind it. trust me if you had any ill feelings meant for me I’d have felt them ages ago. I would’ve also felt it if you had any towards my brother.” That sounded almost like mind reading! It was a bit unnerving but then again not shocking after the trips you'd been experiencing together. You supposed there did have to be some kind of magic behind it.

“Wow, all monsters can do that?”

“to a degree, I’m more sensitive than your typical monster.” You hummed wondering on that briefly and smiled again.

“To answer you, yes I consider us friends. I have for a while now actually.” Sans sockets widened slightly and his eyelights brightened as the corners of his grin lifted. It still amazed you how expressive he was for a supposed skeleton, even his brother was. It made you also feel kind of giddy how easily it was getting to read him as well. Sans looked at your car for a moment and looked back at you casually.

“still want me to call you tsūxa? since you like it so much?” You blushed and Sans chuckled.

“don’t worry I won’t call you that in a monster setting, I’ll use it in the human terms.” Though what he said was reassuring you couldn’t help but feel an odd sadness about it. You decided not to analyze that, you hadn’t had such a good friend in a long time. You weren’t about to let your thoughts complicate that. Not that they hadn’t been adamantly trying to already.

“I’d like that.” Sans sockets lidded as his smile turned gentle.

“g’night tsūxa.” You pulled out your keys and opened your car door grinning at him. Pretending not to feel that shiver that shot through you nor how tender the word had sounded in his deep baritone. Sans pretended he hadn't noticed either.

“Night, bone _daddy_.” You wiggled your brows playfully. He snorted even as he blushed. Once you were fully in your car and shut the door Sans vanished. You stared through your window at where he had been standing and giggled like a teenager. Tonight had been fun. Embarrassing but fun. And you were looking forward to more craziness with your monster buddy.

You started the car and made for home, cursing as you realized you forgot to ask how he knew where you worked.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sans: She don't need to know.  
> Paps: But Sans--  
> Sans: Forget it brother.
> 
> I do have a tumblr and everything in my profile :)  
> Encase you have any questions or whatnot, mostly reblog but Eh XD


	6. Boxers and Socks

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 140+ Kudos!! YES!!! >:D
> 
> Lol thank you for reading this <3
> 
> Have fun! ;3

The dude wouldn’t choose which pack of underwear he wanted. You clenched your hands together behind the counter as you forced your smile to stay. His sky blue eyes panned slowly between the first six pack of boxers and then over to the other, same brands and number of boxers in each. Only difference was the colors and designs. Seriously how hard was it to just pick one? You mean they’re boxers; he acted like he was selecting lingerie with how intently he scrutinized them. Wait…were boxers technically male lingerie?

Did monsters wear lingerie? The idea of Sans and Papyrus modeling boxers made you blush. A light cough brought you back to reality as you looked at the customer, the man’s ears a furious red as he blushed. You raised a brow as he held up both packages and promptly looked away from you. Oh lord you had a feeling about where this was going. You did a very slow blink as you took a deep breath. At least he’s not Ms. Green, At least he’s not Ms. Green…you repeated like a mantra as your smile tightened.

“Which one…do you think is more attractive?” Your eyes panned down over to the first package and you had to resist making a face as you spotted a yellow pair with little suns printed on them, their color an offish shade of orange. The company had really dropped the ball on that design. The other pairs as you could see were simple solid colors with a striped pair at the bottom. Ok aside from that atrocious sun printed one that package was actually kind of normal.

You looked at the second one and couldn’t help how your eyes squinted. The first pair was black but with a pseudo lace design on it. Okay you were officially convinced now that boxers were indeed male lingerie. The others in the package were more creative in their looks than the previous one, you blinked as you laid eyes on a raunchy looking set of red that had velvet like kisses printed on it. You slowly looked back at the man who had begun to squirm, his eyes still determinedly avoiding looking at your face. You noted how tightly he clutched the second package. Was he…looking for some sort of excuse to pick that one? Geez he must’ve had a hell of a home life for his boxer choices to matter so much. It made you feel kind of bad.

“Honestly sir I’d have to say I personally love creative clothing. So I’d pick the second one.” He blinked and slowly looked up at you, his eyes widening in shock. You held your smile and fought not to flinch as he slowly grinned.

“You…find these more attractive?” The way he asked that while waving it made you hesitate. You never said you considered them attractive, just that you found them creative. Your smile dropped as the man smiled smugly. You watched him slam the package down and withdraw the money for it before you could even reach over and grab it to be scanned. You slowly reached over and took the bills while grabbing the underwear at the same time. Carefully you held his money in sight and then tendered his change. As you went to hand it back his hand suddenly grabbed your wrist. 

What. the. Hell!? 

You fought not to instantly slam the guys face into the conveyor belt and instead gritted your teeth soundlessly as you looked up into his face. His smug smile had taken a turn for the worse as his eyes now stared at you lecherously, his whole vibe giving off a cringe worthy nausea. Damn you and your soft heart! Don’t punch him y/n, don’t do it! He leaned in closer and your nose wrinkled. Was that gummy bears you smelled? You hadn’t had the sickly sweet treat since you were twelve. 

“Want to help me try them on?” He asked, his voice trying to go lower in an attempt at a seductive tone. You very sweetly smiled and with the calmest voice you could, replied.

“I think I’d rather help my dead uncle turn over in his grave. That’d be a more enjoyable sight.” Yeah...ok maybe that was a bit dark but it was so worth the way his smile dropped and the way his eyes looked at you incredulously, like he couldn’t believe you had just said that. The only thing you weren’t happy about the way he reacted was the fact he _still_ hadn’t let fucking go of your wrist. Were you seriously about to lose your job for causing bodily injury? That was going to suck.

“hey _buddy_ , you’re holding up the line.” You both jumped slightly, not expecting another customer to be there and turned to see who had spoken. Your heart nearly jumped out of your chest as you laid eyes on Sans, his eyelights flickering from where you were held up to the man accosting you. His smile remained lazy even as his sockets lidded in silent threat. Your eyes slowly looked over and an inner glee hit you as the man visibly paled at the sight of the skeleton. This was to perfect. With a carefree air you turned back and smiled smugly.

“Well what do you know… _it’s my uncle_.” The dude was quick to release you and scramble, nearly tripping over his feet as he ran out the door screaming. You busted up in laughter and held onto your sides which ached from the force of it. Slowly you looked up at Sans who had a brow raised in question. 

“Bad attempt at a joke! What’s up?” You asked happily, a genuine smile etching your features as you looked at your monster friend. Apparently your smile was contagious because the corners of his mouth lifted as he sat his items on the counter.

“picking up some supplies, paps asked me to. figured I’d stop in to say hey.” You chuckled as you watched him place down a box of tooth brushes and paste, his bony hands slowly emptying the hand held basket he carried. You supposed dental hygiene would be a big priority for skeleton monsters.

“So you do know where I work.” He snorted as he placed a bag of spaghetti noodles down. You ignored the conflicting emotional roller coaster at the sight of it. Judging by how he cheekily smiled though he must’ve seen your reaction to them. Great another way he was going to be able to tease you! You really needed to up your game because he was starting to have way too much ammo over you.

“i should, I’ve shopped here before y’know.” That statement made you pause. Your back straightened as you looked at him. When had he ever come into the store? You seriously doubted you would’ve forgotten meeting a skeleton before, especially if it was before ever hanging out with him. Monsters were still so new to you the memory would’ve been burned into your brain like a cattle brand.

“When?” He looked up in thought as he slowly sat a bottle of bleach down.

“oh, about maybe…six months ago?” Six months ago? That was close to the time you’d started working here. How did you still not notice him!? The monster employment intuitive wasn’t even in effect at that point so a monster roaming around would’ve been a big deal! Sans smiled as he closed his sockets in memory, withdrawing and setting down a jar of pasta sauce. 

“yeah, you were stocking the shelves I think. you’re buddy with the weird hair checked me out, and you had apparently dropped a box of doritos. made a joke about how it could be _dori_ ngerous. kid had no sense of humor.” You chuckled imagining Mark’s insulted face at a monster teasing about his crush. Sans smile only got wider at how you laughed. At least you could appreciate a poorly timed pun. He looked down and paused slightly as he spied the final item in his basket. He fought not to blush and sat it on the counter. 

You noticed his slightly quick movement though and tilted your head curiously. It was a package of socks, an expensive one to. They were silk and every pair was decorative, from small lacy duck patterns to star studded ones. You glanced up at him and noticed he was looking pretty hard at the rack of cheap candy next to you, his lazy expression looking forced. 

He was acting similar to how that guy had…no way. You looked back down at them. Were socks…a thing for him? You thought back on Papyrus’s comment from dinner the other night and the sight in front of you. Your boney friend was boney for socks! You were eyeing his equivalence of lingerie!

An evil idea popped into your head. But first to lure him into thinking he was safe. Revenge for the pasta was about to be yours! You began to ring him up, purposefully avoiding the socks. Judging by the way his eyelights flickered at you he knew you were up to something. Best way to distract was by conversation! 

“So how’s the dog stand going?” Sans sockets lidded. Yep he knew you were up to something.

“good.” He droned. You hummed.

“Must admit, the whole vegan lifestyle has started to tempt me since I ate one of your dogs. Didn’t know healthy food could taste so good.” Sans’s eyelights watched as you skimmed the socks again and opted to scan the bleach. He had purposefully placed those socks near the front so you could scan them faster and here you were ghosting them.

“really?” he asked skeptically with a raised brow. You fought not to giggle.

“Yep and that's only the veganning,” He snorted at the pun, good almost got him! “Turns out vegans have a longer lifespan than all us unhealthy folk. Who knows maybe I’ll get to live to be old as you are.” You tampered down your snicker as he blushed, his expression a deadpan.

“i doubt that is how it works… tsūxa.” He did not just repeat the way he had said your nickname the other night! His smug look was all you needed to know he had made you blush. You know what, that was fine. You’d let him have his little moment. Because you were already down to his last item. With deliberate slowness as you held his look you reached for it. Sans smile threatened to falter as you over exaggeratedly held them up and widened your eyes, pretending to lean in closer and look at them better. He gripped the inside of his hoodie pocket. You were evil.

“Wow Sans, these socks are beautiful.” He blushed navy as you scanned them. He eyed you waiting for more and almost couldn’t believe it as you remained silent, merely holding his bags out to him in offer. Ok maybe you weren’t completely evil. He reached for the bags but paused midway as you smiled mischievously.

“Y’know…I have a favorite pair of socks at home.” His sockets widened. Your smile bordered on sadistic as you raised a playfully seductive brow. You weren’t seriously about to—

“They’re skeletal print.” His eyelights went out and he froze. You looked him up and down smugly as you snickered. 

“Thanks for shopping at Hustle and Bustle!” Satisfied you placed the bags handles over his out stretched hand and leaned in close to the side of his skull where an ear would’ve normally been.

“… _come_ again.” Sans vanished before you could even lean back. You fell to your knees in unequivocal laughter, your eyes actually tearing up as your lungs strained. It took a good five minutes before you were able to breathe properly again, a light sweat had broken over your skin but you felt light. Lighter than you had in ages. Raising back to your feet you spent the rest of your shift chuckling and giggling. 

By the time you had gotten home it was close to midnight and you were tired enough that you moved straight to your bedroom where you fell numbly into the mattress. You had a shift tomorrow anyways why bother changing right? A few wrinkles wouldn’t kill anyone. You giggled as you thought back on Sans’s blush. God your bony buddy was cute sometimes! A small vibration from your pocket made you jump as you extracted your phone.

 **???** : yur srsly makin me rejudge humans

You frowned for only a second, how had Sans gotten your number? It had to be Sans after all the word human gave away the fact it was a monster texting you. Aside from his brother now he was the only monster you knew. Eh, at least you had a way to talk regularly now. You could always get him back later for his ninja skills. Smiling you shrugged as you responded.

 **You** : Text speak Sans? I thought you were a scientist, pulling up a bit short in the impressing department. ;)

You chuckled as your phone vibrated.

 **BoneDaddy** : my hypothesis has reached a viable conclusion that you are in fact a being of iniquitous intentions

You snorted.

 **You** : Ok too much lol you have to admit it was hilarious though!

 **BoneDaddy** : maybe to you tsūxa

 **You** : I’m sorry

 **BoneDaddy** : hate liars just so you know

 **You** : Aw! Don’t be that way Sans! If you're mad who'll give me more dogs?

 **BoneDaddy** : sorry was busy eating paps spaghetti what did you say?

You narrowed your eyes at your phone and then smirked.

 **You** : I’m not a liar though :)

 **BoneDaddy** : I regret to inform you, your thesis falls short based on supporting evidence.

You snickered as you moved over to your dresser and then plopped back onto your bed, humming as you pulled off your used socks and shoes. You stilled as you glanced at your closet. If you were a cat your ears would have curled evilly.

Sans hummed as he dug into his brother’s food, his eyelights focused on his phone sitting open on your text conversation. He jumped slightly as his brother said the word cough making him look up into disapproving sockets. He grinned childishly as he bit into another chunk of his brothers creation trying to pretend he didn't notice. Papyrus rolled his eyes and looked back down as he resumed eating. A small chocobo sound from one of the video games he liked to play sounded and made Sans look down. 

You had sent a picture; you were leaned against the mahogany head board of your bed with a pillow below your lower back making your hips jut out tauntingly...dressed in skull print pajamas, your top a button up that was slightly undone exposing a small peek of the upper swell of a breast. And your face was a dangerous smile as you had a leg hiked up perfectly presenting your foot to the camera of the phone, a skeletal bone printed sock adorning it. Sans’s fork fell from his teeth.

 **tsūxa** : Care to reevaluate my thesis mister scientist?

Papyrus jumped up in concern as Sans began to hack violently. The shorter monster making sure to hide his phone rapidly in his pocket as his sibling pounded on his back. Chocking was a thing for them? Sans was learning new things himself thanks to you. One of the things being that it was a possibility that he could die from how quickly his magic could surge through his ribs.

You stared at your phone to see if he’d reply but figured he was too shocked to do so. Hopefully you didn’t kill him or anything. You were really attached to him and him dying from a…lewd? Photo would probably scar you for life. Resigned he was done texting you for the night you rolled over and plugged in your phone before passing out.

_Darkness shifted and gave way to a sea of colors, vague noises turning into sharp sounds and burning images. The needle. The screaming. Why did he bring a knife? Why were you just lying there? His throaty chuckle. A splattering of blood as the sound of a car horn blared—_

“BOBBY!” You shot up screaming as your heart raced, the spot in the crook of your elbow burning from a phantom injection you’d taken years ago. You tried to focus, tried to tell yourself where you were but your world was spinning. You reached over and yanked your phone off the charger seeing it was nearly three in the morning. You didn’t care. You shook and gave a dry heave as the phone rang. 

**_Pickuppickuppickup!_ **

“’ello? y/n?” Sans groggy tone sounded over the line.

“Sans! Please I—“ You clutched at your chest as it slammed painfully making you gag. You vaguely heard a rustling on the other end of the phone, when Sans spoke again it was more alert and calm.

“what’s your address?” You tried to say it but your throat was closing. 

“ _tsūxa_ , tell me where you live.” Sans’s tone was slow and deliberate. You felt your mouth move but you weren’t sure sound came out as your phone fell from your shaking grip. You fell sideways from your mattress to the floor, the lungs in your chest inflating and deflating rapidly. You thought you heard a rapid knocking but try as you might you couldn’t move. Your vision strobed just as you saw Sans pop into being before you, his eyelights pinpricks as they landed on you.

“what the hell happened?” He growled as he rushed over and pulled you up into his arms. You shivered from ancient cold in your hotter than hell apartment as he clutched you. You didn’t know he could growl did you? You wanted to make a joke say something on it, but you only curled into him. Your hands too weak to hold onto his hoodie. 

He picked you up with surprising ease and moved you both over to your bed where he scooted onto it, making sure there was room to stretch you out as he laid your head into his lap. He brushed your hair from your clammy face and cupped it as he read the twitches and jerks your muscles were doing. You had woken from a nightmare he could tell by the dark sacks under your eyes, his got the same way when he slept but didn’t rest. He made a noise when he say how haunted you looked, you were having a reaction to a possible trauma.

“need you to try and breath ok?” His voice was like a distorted echo but you forced yourself to try and focus on your lungs, will them into evening out. It wasn’t working.

_You could still hear Bobby scream._

Sans removed only one hand from your face and reached into a hidden pocket in the inside of his hoodie withdrawing a solid black colored blunt. He shakily shoved it between his teeth and then withdrew a lighter. He closed his sockets a second trying to remain calm as he held the lighter up. He hoped this worked for you the way it did for him.

He lit it and tossed his lighter aside onto the mattress as he quickly yanked the joint from his mouth to yours trying to encourage you to inhale it. You tensed seeing it and wailed as your body pathetically squirmed in his hold. It was making your episode worse. That’s when Sans realized just what kind of trauma it was you were reacting to. Cursing to himself he brought it up to his lips and took the deepest inhale he possibly could before leaning down to you.

Your vision was steadily going dark to the point you didn’t realize San’s face was close to yours, the cold pressure of teeth against your mouth making you gasp in shock and inhale a thick smog like smoke. You chocked but Sans didn’t move away, he held your face firmly in place and it took everything in you to breathe through the smoke he was pushing into you.

The effects were immediate.

You were on a cliff face overlooking a crashing wave that sounded like thunder as it slammed against the hard rock in its path. The swirling water reflected the darkened clouds above it, the shapes unidentifiable faces that twisted and sneered up at you. A whimper made you turn and you were looking down at a huddled child, her clothes torn and hair a scraggily mess of shredded and worn locks as she sobbed. 

You tried to move to her but your feet were frozen. A loud clash of water made you turn back and see a gigantic wave rushing forward. You quickly glanced back at the girl who hadn’t noticed but only continued to sob. You fought to run to her, the wave growing closer with each second you struggled. As it’s looming shadow stretched across the ground like an eclipse you threw your hands up in a futile effort to hold it back. You screwed your eyes shut in silent prayer.

A small gasp made your eyes go open again. The little girl was in front of you, her face obscured as she held up a single hand towards the water in perfect form your arms were. Slowly you lowered your arms and watched as she mimicked you, the giant wave receding as she did so. Curiously you moved your arm sideways. She copied. The water moved in time with the girl. You looked at her as she turned, a small smile the only feature you could make out.

“Don’t let yourself drown.” Your voice echoed from her. You yelled right as the wave crashed around the both of you, the violent swirling of the water dragging you and twisting you in random directions. You tried to focus as you held your breath, your arms struggling to right you. Your searching eyes locked on a distorted figure. 

You forced yourself forward.

Your hand shot out as you shouted for it.

You gasped as your eyes focused, your body aching. You looked around yourself seeing your room and then moved upward to see Sans hunched over you, his eyelights wide and searching as he frowned. You coughed noticing your breath was even and your skin no longer felt cold. You tried to smile.

“…hate…when you…frown…” Your voice came out an ugly scratch. Slowly Sans’s frown turned upward and his pearly whites appeared from behind bony lips. You sighed as you relaxed into him, your eyes sliding shut.

Sans watched as you quietly slid into sleep. The pheromone must’ve been strong enough that one hit had been all you needed. He wondered briefly what that said about him. Sighing himself he let go of your face and fell backwards against your head board, taking a hard hit of the smoke as he picked it up from the ashtray by your bed. He watched wordlessly as a thick black cloud of smoke slipped from his mouth and nose, traces of it going up from his neckline.

You certainly knew how to wake a guy up. His eyelights flickered down and he brushed his phalanges of his free hand through your hair. You made a cute face in reaction to his touch making him chuckle. He planted the pheromone back between his teeth and carefully maneuvered a pillow below your head for comfort. He was satisfied when you snuggled into it. Good. You were sleeping normally. He'd learned a lot about you tonight that he'd have to think over. He hadn't realized how similar you both were.

He felt the drug kicking in and promptly tapped out the pheromone in the ashtray before replacing the half smoked joint back into his secret pocket. You wouldn’t mind if he crashed here would you? He shrugged. You probably wouldn’t get as mad as you would once you found out he’d kissed you. He made a disgruntled noise. That wasn’t a kiss. He’d purposefully kept his mandible from folding to lock with your lips. His teeth touching your soft lips couldn't count right? His sockets slowly slid shut as sleep came to claim him.

Yeah that wasn’t a kiss...

Right?


	7. Crossing lines and signals

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 180+ kudos!! XD  
> Guys! Thank you so much!!
> 
> Sorry for the delay btw, my mind was on the fritz :/  
> Plus life stuff!
> 
> Hope it's enjoyable!

You groaned as you tried to throw an arm over your eyes. Stupid sun! It was too early to try blinding you! You turned over and moaned into your pillow stubbornly. You didn’t want to get up, you felt so comfortable and relaxed that the mere thought of having to get out of bed hurt your lazy soul. You hadn’t felt this good in…a while. 

You stretched with another yawn and froze in place. Your hand was touching something or someone. You patted it lightly just to be sure, yep that was obviously a shirt you were feeling up on a rather thin body. There was an anorexic stranger in your bed!? Your head shot up and you stared as your sleep addled brain took in the image in front of you.

Sans was laid across the top of your mattress, his body stretched out as wide as it could go in its tiny amount of space. His arms out above his head and one leg bent upwards while the other was angled sideways. He looked about to pose for playmonster with how his shorts dipped on his hip exposing bone, his shirt raised slightly exposing a bit of spine and his coat spread out beneath him. You’d thought his teeth had been attractive…this was…something else. He looked so venerable and delicate. 

Sans was in your bed.

Your bone buddy was in your fucking _bed_.

Just what were you supposed to do in this situation? 

Wait…this was perfect actually! You could explore him a bit without it being awkward by asking him questions constantly! Plus the confused look on his face when you made a hidden pun would just be to hilarious…still didn’t help how anxious you suddenly felt though. Lordy you were such a bitch weren’t you? Calling him at godforsaken hours to help you with relapses and now sneaking peeks and prods while he slept. No you couldn’t feel shame right now, you’d chicken out faster than a cow that was advertising chick-fi-la all to avoid being made into a burger!

You eyed his hip bone and looked at his sleeping face curiously before you slowly reached up and poked it. It was warm to the touch just like his hand had been and surprisingly smooth. Warm bones…there had to be a joke in there somewhere. Glancing over to make sure you hadn’t disturbed him you poked it a little harder and made a surprised noise as it had a little give to it. The pressure of your finger leaving a tiny indention that quickly faded. Did all his bones do that?

Sans was still snoring away, the slow rise and fall of his chest making you even more curious as you thought back to watching him smoke. He was a skeleton, he didn’t have lungs right? You had seen how the smoke slipped from his neckline but you had also seen him eat. Where did it go? You eyed the hem of his slightly raised shirt. A peek wouldn’t hurt would it? If he was all bones there was nothing to be ashamed of being seen right? Then again you could look and come face to face with a scene straight from the living dead with red stuff and pumping organs.  
You looked at his peaceful face. There was no way a human or monster could have exposed organs and still look like that when sleeping. 

Screw it. 

It was just a quick peek, you weren’t going to grope him or anything. Could you even grope bone? Slowly you leaned flat and raised the bottom of the thread bare shirt. Damn it was so thin! How often did he wear this thing? You made a disgruntled huff. If he caught you maybe you could bribe him into forgetting the whole thing with a new shirt collection or something. You really didn’t want him to catch you. Was this how somnophiliacs felt? 

OK NOT THINKING ABOUT THAT! 

You shook your head and slowly peered in.

It was dark. Your room was kind of lit with daylight pouring in the window so it was bizarre how dark it was. Maybe if you moved closer? Huh you didn’t see anything still. You couldn’t get eaten by doing this could you? more than halfway up his shirt you stiffened as a light chuckling echoed and vibrated similar to how you’d imagine a cave bouncing the noise around would do.

“y’know…as much as I find you trying to peek under my shirt a real rib tickler, being in my actual rib cage is just downright hilarious.” Sans’s voice seemed to billow all around you. Damn you’d been caught! In your embarrassment you tried to shoot up and away but apparently you didn’t hear the part of being in his rib cage because your face slammed painfully into bone. There wasn’t that much give damn!

“hrk!” Sans coughed and jerked at how harshly you collided with him, lifting him slightly off the bed before falling back into him painfully, he lost his breath as you then tried to struggle. Sans's vision spotted, he had never been hit from behind his ribs before and no matter how soft your hair was or the squishiness of your face it did little to cushion the blow to his sensitive magic and bone.

“I’m sorry!” You cried trying to shimmy out only to cause more unpleasant noise from Sans and then a painful tug on the back of your head. 

You stilled. 

Oh no. 

You weren’t seriously-? You reached a hand up accidentally brushing along the front of his ribs to which Sans fought to repress a moan before finally maneuvering your hand inside and up to your head.

Your hair was fucking tangled on his bones. 

Damn your cow-licked and frazzled bedhead!

Sans felt you start to tug at something and it made him hiss at how it seemed to only tighten around him. His sockets widened in realization and he jerked as one of your locks slid into a joint making his toes curl. This wasn’t good!

“y/n! s-stop for a minute!” He choked with a high pitched whine as your hair only gripped him tighter the more you tried to untangle from him. You stilled instantly. Not only from the fact that had been a hot as hell sound to come from him but more so that he was now trying to reposition himself, his hands on your shoulders pulling you up into a leaning position against him. 

With a small huff the darkness was lifted as he removed his shirt. You were staring at your room through the bottom of his rib cage, a slightly dark haze over it. As embarrassed as you were you had to admit the sight was pretty cool.

Sans took a moment to look down at the situation and sighed. He was going to have to flex his ribs to get at the obvious knot of hair that had tangled against his spine. Honestly you just had to be curious didn’t you? Then again he probably should’ve suspected something when he’d felt an intrusion against his magic, instead of ignoring the itch he’d received and chalking it up to that annoying dog cuddling into his ribs like it liked to do sometimes he knew he should've woken up.

He was glad though you weren’t freaking out in the sense a normal human would’ve. If anything you seemed to busy being intrigued by how his magic made a dark tint from behind his bones that you were currently nestled in. Welp, time to see if it was possible to freak you out at all. He just hoped you waited till after you were free to do so. 

“this is going to look a bit weird.” He muttered. You looked up at the bottom of his jaw. Seriously? Like staring through a living being’s rib cage without being eaten wasn’t weird? You were about to comment on what exactly his definition of weird was when your eyes widened. Sans took a deep breath which sounded like a rush of wind and the space between his ribs grew, the bones shifted out and lowered from each other. It reminded you of when a frog would enlarge their throat almost. Did he have some frog magic in him? Sans then slipped his hands in and began to deftly work at where you had tangled yourself.

Yep this was embarrassing. Could you just die now? Sans chuckled.

“if you had wanted to see me shirtless all you had to do was ask y’know.” You ignored the blush that lit up your face.

“Thought you’d be shy about that with how much you wear your coat constantly.” Sans snorted.

“paps is the one who’s body shy.” You raised a brow.

“With how he dresses?” Sans tsked at you playfully.

“judging people based on looks? not something i expected from you tsūxa.” Sans felt his magic try to flare as you shivered against him from the nickname, your body’s reaction vibrating into his sensitive bones, and it took him stilling and a very solid minute of forcing the magic to calm. It was going to be awkward if you suddenly felt something other than his bones against your back. Obviously your appeal of the nickname went a little deeper than simply liking it. Which was fine, he just hoped you didn’t notice how he had locked up just now.

You noticed Sans freeze like you’d shot him or something but purposefully ignored the way his hands clenched tightly at your hair and the way his ribs moved as he took a deep breath. You screwed your eyes shut before blinking them several times. This wasn’t intimate or anything, you were just hanging out with your skeletal friend currently tucked up into his ribs, held hostage by your hair that he was delicately untangling.

The silence stretched.

“This is another thing that’s considered intimate isn’t it?” Sans looked up at a poster you kept on your wall awkwardly. His lack of response was very condemning. You felt him shift slightly before he went back to untangling your knot, his phalanges brushing through it as he went. When he finally spoke he sounded casual. 

“currently you’re in a very thick pool of my magic, so anything like intentions and reactions are amplified right now. so yeah it’s kind of intimate.” Did you ask to die earlier? That was a weak request, you meant could someone _erase_ your very existence? You bit your lip and tried to force a smile.

“So uh…get many humans all up in your bones very often?” Sans snorted.

“nah, you’d be the second. not to many people keen on a walking graveyard.” You looked down and relaxed into him. For a monster made of bone he suddenly felt very comfortable.

“Thanks for coming over last night er- this morning I mean.” Sans hummed as he managed to reduce the tangle and brushed the newly freed lock into the rest of your strands. He cautiously looked down at your face, being careful with his tone.

“anytime, kinda know where you’re coming from. i get episodes to from time to time.” He watched as you glanced up at him in confusion and curiosity but you simply made a sympathetic face and looked back through his ribs, your eyes panning along them as if trying to memorize their detail. He could feel the fact you wanted to know, hell he was even grateful you didn’t ask. But being a bit of a hypocrite he was curious about you himself.

“want to talk about it?” He whispered. You stiffened but then relaxed again. He knew the ironic smirk that played across your lips, he’d worn it before. Seeing it he knew this conversation was about to come to a very abrupt stop.

“I’ll tell you mine if you tell me yours.” And there it was. As much as he was curious…he hadn’t known you long enough to spill all of his proverbial guts. And you clearly weren’t wanting to either. It was starting to unnerve him just how you were both alike.

You both lapsed into silence and you couldn’t help but focus on how his hands moved, they were so dexterous you could picture his fingers over lapping in ways a human’s wouldn’t be able to with all the flesh and muscle in the way. They also had a sort of rhythm to them that made you lull slightly as he finger combed another freed lock into your strands. You fought not to fall asleep in his ribs; you just didn’t know what line _that_ would be crossing.

The knot finally coming undone was a quick relief as you finally slid out from beneath his ribs and watched as he exhaled and let them condense back into place. Your face felt really tingly for some reason like it had fallen asleep. You and Sans both looked at each other and chuckled as he pulled his shirt back on. Well now that your curiosity had been satisfied and you were no longer in a rib prison you quickly stood and stretched not noticing Sans’s blush as your back popped.

“Do you like eggs?” You asked. 

Sans had to admit you had a cozy little apartment. It was sparsely decorated though and messy with how you had clothing randomly strewn about it. Felt kind of like home. He did notice the glaring absence of pictures though, there wasn’t a single photograph anywhere not even of you. He’d ask about it but with how you’d responded over the question about last night he knew better. Sans wondered even more what made you so chipper and carefree most of the time. Especially if you had a weight on your shoulders. Stars knew he was nowhere close to how you were.

He looked over at you as you moved to and fro between your fridge and stove, your skeletal clad socked feet barely resting fully on the floor until you had gathered all your ingredients. Sans kept watching as one of your feet lifted to scratch along the back of the other, the skeletal print flexing with the movement of your muscle. He jumped slightly as he caught himself staring for the fifth time and tried to focus more on what you were doing stove wise. His eyes kept panning down. You sure moved your feet a lot.

“You can sit down you know.” You called absently over your shoulder as you grabbed two eggs and like a chef from kitchen nightmares cracked them both one handed. You were impressed you didn’t get in any shell in it. Score! You heard your buddy shuffle his way over to the table and take a seat right as you grabbed a few seasonings and began to make it rain flavor. You just hoped it wasn’t too much flavor, then again with how he devoured his brother’s cooking you weren’t too worried. Poor boy probably couldn’t taste much of anything.

“Hope you like my cooking! I rarely get to do it.” You looked over and smiled at him smugly. He raised a brow and snorted.

“don’t worry, I don’t have to high _egg_ spectations to meet.” You chuckled at the pun.

“ _Egg_ cellent.” Sans rolled his eyelights playfully.

“stealing a guy’s material? that’s low.” You shook your head wordlessly at his mock hurt and deigned not to respond as you flipped the eggs. You felt so full of energy. It was really surprising after your episode last night, usually you’d be a numbed wreak right now. You paused as you vaguely recalled Sans trying to get you to smoke something in your pained haze. A pheromone? Maybe that explained how rested you felt.

“Hey Sans.” He flicked his eyelights away from your feet and up to the back of your head.

“tsūxa?” You smiled subconsciously still eyeing the cooking food.

“I’m slowly remembering things from last night.” Sans stiffened.

“yeah?” You frowned, why did his voice go slightly deeper? You turned to look at him and saw he was staring pointedly down at the kitchen table, like a kid caught stealing from the cookie jar. That was awfully suspicious. 

“Yeah,” You drawled. “I remembered you trying to get me to smoke something.” Sans immediately looked less tense and faced you.

“oh that, it was another pheromone. specifically designed to help deal with night terrors, sends you straight into REM sleep with a dose of relaxation. i usually like having your consent when smoking them but you looked like you really needed it. you put up quite a fight though when I tried to get you to smoke it.” You continued to stare at him for a long moment. You learned a long time ago just staring at someone for no reason at all could usually elicit feelings of guilt or remorse if they’d done something you suspected they weren’t meant to and right now your smoke buddy was starting to bead sweat at the top of his skull despite how impassive his expression was. The fact he was sweating was another cool fact to learn about him. To bad it was dampened by how sneaky he was acting. Ok just what did he do exactly?

“Did I?” You asked tilting your head slightly.

“yep.” Sans popped the p as he looked away and closed his sockets like he was preparing for a nap. You had another feeling he was doing something to avoid the conversation. There was simply no way he was tired enough to nap with how nervous he obviously was.

Sans kept his sockets shut even as he heard you walk over and felt you standing next to him. He really didn’t want to talk about the not a kiss thing, not only would it make this morning’s situation more awkward for you but it might be considered too violating. And he really wasn’t that kind of monster. But being the stubborn human he’d come to know, he you wouldn’t let up. He felt your finger poke his cheek. He cracked a socket lazily at you.

“So that stuff we aren’t talking about,” He opened both his sockets at that. “I bet you figured it out when you tried to get that pheromone in me. I fight with anything that might be drug related when I’m like that, weed, medicine. Mind telling me what you had to do to get me to take the pheromone?” You watched as his eyelights pinpricked and a blush shot across his face. That reaction was all you needed to get a brief flash of pearly whites pressed against your mouth. At first you were stunned then slowly you frowned.

“Did you…kiss me?” Sans sockets went dark and his smile grimaced. Holy shit he had kissed you! And you had been too deep in the sarlacc pit of despair to even catch or enjoy it! Wait why were you so sure you’d enjoy it? You blushed and bit your lip. This just wasn’t fair! He got to kiss you and you didn’t even get the experience, you felt robbed, jilted, cheated! Why were you so upset you’d missed it?

Sans eyelights slowly came back as he noticed you didn’t look angry. You looked flustered and frustrated? The moment you blushed he knew instantly you weren’t as upset about the fact it _had_ happened so much as you probably _missed_ it happening. At this point he was willing to relent it was a kiss. If only to use it now. Mercilessly. 

You watched as Sans slowly came down from his anxiousness and eyed your face. The moment he smirked you knew he was going to now use it as material against you, especially since you couldn’t honestly say you were angry about it. Was it too late to pretend you were? Should you smack him? Would that even hurt him so much as you? Why the hell was he so good at reading faces!?

“kinda had to…did you know your lips are really _soft_ tsūxa? want to tell me how you get them that way.” You felt your face catch literal fire at his inquiry. This monster had no shame whatsoever did he? Not only had he snuck a kiss, maybe unintentionally, but now he was using that fact. Not one to be upped on the teasing you lidded your eyes and did your best to look sultry behind the glowing redness of your face.

“I honestly don’t know Sans, I don’t do anything special…want to kiss me again and give a hypothesis on your observation?” If Sans had been drinking anything he would of sprayed it across your table with how he choked in reaction. Good thing you were a terrible host. You kind of loved how using his ex-profession in your teasing always seemed to get him. Just to add fuel to the fire you leaned in and closed your eyes.

Sans stared at you like he was seeing a ghost. And not of the monster variety. He could tell you had been joking…until you leaned in and presented your mouth to him. His eyelights searched your face rapidly before landing back on the pale plumpness of your lips. He felt his magic surge and his face was now hot as he stared at them. He faintly recalled now that he was thinking about it, exactly how they had felt against his teeth, it was nothing like they’d feel if his mouth actually locked with them.

He suddenly felt uncomfortable.

When you noticed he hadn’t moved or made a joke at your action you slowly opened an eye to peek at him and then opened both of them in concern. Sans looked upset. Not so much angry but more conflicted. His eyelights were tiny dots at this point and his mouth was pressed tightly shut, he was also visibly _shaking_. You automatically pulled back.

“Are you ok? I’m sorry I didn’t realize that would upset you.” Sans blinked as he noticed your look of concern. He suddenly hated himself. He hated when his friends and his brother would all direct that look at him and personally he had never wanted to see it on your face. You were his smoke partner, a person who didn’t judge, worry or prod him over doctor visits or possible depression feelings and all that mess. 

You weren’t supposed to tip toe cautiously in worry over triggering him.

You were supposed to be an oasis in the desert of concern.

And now it felt like it was slightly tainted.

You frowned further as you noticed how blank his face went. It was like all his emotions had been wiped away leaving nothing but an empty shell. You recognized that state of being. It was a personal favorite your mind liked to pull you into. The worst thing you could do right now would be to try comforting, if anything you knew how much it would only numb him further. Pity and compassion always made you clam up just because of how hollow it felt, how pointless in those moments. So you decided to take a page from his book. You walked back over to the stove and flipped the eggs.

“Crap I think I burned them!” Sans slowly looked over at you, the heavy numbness still suffocating as he spoke.

“did you?” You turned and smiled apologetically.

“Yeah but don’t worry, think you’ll like how close it is to Papyrus’s cooking.” Sans felt himself smile as he snorted.

“don’t think you can compare to my bro’s cooking.” You shrugged.

“You’re right, I’m not that cool.” Sans slowly felt his smile become a little more genuine. How did you do that? You knew the exact thing to say to fluster him and now you knew exactly what topic would make him feel a little more…here. Sans laughed.

You looked at him confused for a moment before you smiled again. He had come right back from the brink and he was acting normal. It did concern you though to wonder what he was like when he was in the pit though. You made a new set of eggs as his laughter died and continued to speak to him.

“I should really just feed you these instead of starting over.” 

“why don’t you?” Sans asked as he pulled his phone out and began to scroll on it.

“Because I’m secretly hoping you do have some taste buds at least. After all your taste in food is almost as concerning as your taste in music.”

“i’ll have you know i have excellent taste in music.” Sans said matter of factly. You snorted as you flipped the eggs.

“Right, if you count the last century as still popular.” You teased as you returned the jab he’d given over your hotdog joke. Sans raised both his eyebrows in response as you winked at him before returning to the stove. Served him right. You waited for a witty retort but Sans was uncharacteristically silent which made you automatically suspicious and concerned again. 

“Why so—“ 

“ _look at my butt~_ ” You tensed up as the sounds of a pipe organ roared loudly behind the sloppy lyrics of nikki minaj. 

He seriously wasn’t was he? 

You slowly turned to stare blankly at the monster currently seated at your table, his smile like a thousand Walt light bulb and his sockets narrowed mischievously as he waved his phone. All your concern went straight out the window.

Yep, he had seriously started the atrocious anaconda and phantom of the opera mashup that had nearly set the entire internet ablaze. What’s worse, he was enjoying it. The one song that had taken your favorite musical and turned it into a laughing stock. His attraction points just took a nose dive into the negatives. You were glad you’d missed out on that kiss. You felt utterly betrayed. 

“something wrong?” Sans teased as you tuned away from him. If you just ignored it you could pretend you were alone and not worry about the food possibly burning. Yeah that’s it, there was no monster named Sans! You silently disowned your bony friend as you shoved the spatula rather violently under the egg and flipped it. You tried to zone out the abominable music but apparently Sans had other ideas as you felt him suddenly looming behind you.

“i actually like this song, really innovative.” You glanced at him insulted from the corner of your eyes. Innovative!? There was nothing innovative about mixing such emotional music with something so stupid! Sans chuckled and suddenly you felt his hands on your hips, the contact making you blush furiously. Before you could react he was suddenly singing along to the phantoms lines in your ear.

“ _and though you turn from me to glance behind,_ ” He twirled you and smiled teasingly, his deep baritone surprising you with how easily it flowed with the music.

“ _the phantom of the opera is there,_ ” he tapped your nose making you squeak in shock. “ _inside your mind~_ ” He dipped you as he wriggled his bony brows like the snide monster he was being. You swore he loved provoking you.

“ _my anaconda don’t want none unless you got buns hun~_ ” Ok nope! This was one game you refused to play! And then you felt his hand move. You stiffened as you felt his bony fingers dig into your backside right as he said buns and that’s when your eyes narrowed even as your heart gave an excited lurch in your chest. 

Sans smiled innocently. He had a quick recovery didn’t he? The idea of kissing you made him lock up but apparently playfully touching your rear was fine. What the hell. Did monsters consider certain things more intimate than others? Not that it really bothered you. And then there was another question on your mind because you obviously had to make this into an episode of jeopardy mentally.

Why in the world couldn’t you resist falling so low as to get back at him?

“ _Those who have seen your face draw back in fear~_ ” You copied the lyrics as you stood properly, your skeletal friend widening his sockets in surprise. You smirked as you placed a hand on his shoulder and pushed him towards the wall of your kitchen. You almost laughed at his shocked expression when his back made contact with the hard wood.

He had not been expecting that. Maybe a jab or even an off handed comment, not you participating.

“ _I am the mask you wear~_ ” You drew out the lyrics as you slowly turned and pressed you back into him and slowly slid down, ignoring the slight hardness to his bones beneath his clothing. Sans stared at you completely at a loss just numbly mouthing his lines as you shot back up and pressed your chests together. You loved how navy his face had gone.

“ _it’s me they hear…_ ” He chocked slightly on his words. You were so warm all over and it made him vibrate slightly at the contact you were initiating. This was fine; he had no complaints about this. He hummed slightly as your hands slid onto his shoulders and slightly dug into them. Yep this was fine.

“ _Your spirit and my voice in one combined~_ ” You ran a hand through your hair taking delight in how his eyelights unashamedly followed it, only stopping to extinguish as your other hand poked and prodded at his ribs underlined beneath his shirt.

Ok that was a bit much. Purposefully going for his ribs was meaningful, thank lord you were ignorant about it.

“ _The phantom of the opera is there inside my mind~_ ” You leaned close to his skull making sure your breath touched him not sure if he’d feel that or not. You were rewarded with a deep shiver. Pushing your luck you moved his hands to your waist and you saw his eyelights faintly come back as you grinded your hips and chest into him, flinging your hair back like you’d seen it done in one of those olay commercials. He was staring at you a complete wreak, his face torn between shock and confusion.

He was getting a lot of mixed signals. You were going back and forth between casual and intimate and it was throwing him for a loop. 

You smiled devilishly as you felt his hands grip you and slid tentatively up and down your sides. You ignored how it made you blush and the way it sent pleasurable chills through you, his textured hands roaming along your heated skin, instead focusing on keeping your head on straight. 

He felt your body’s reaction and he found himself enjoying it, the way your skin prickled and moved beneath his hands.

You rested your hands on the wall on either side of him as his hands slid down and halted at your hips his eyelights flickering up to your eyes. You winked and his hands slid to your ass as you arched your back. You unintentionally moaned at the contact almost forgetting the horrible music echoing through your kitchen.

Sans shivered at the noise you made and repressed a groan. Casual touching was fine he kept repeating to himself as his hands continued to move. You didn’t seem bothered by it like a normal human would be. His breath caught as he felt one of your hands grip his hip. There was no sexual intention coming off you so this was perfectly fine, petting was natural among monsters.

You sighed as his hands stroked along your lower back before coming back to yourself just in time as the music reached the part you were aiming for. You leaned perilously close to his face and he started to breathe rapidly, his movements slowing and his eyelights shrinking. You were leaning a bit too close for comfort. 

You decided to pull this joke off before he locked up again.

“I don’t want none unless you got buns hun.” Sans stilled and his eyelights went out again as the song ended. You casually pulled away from him and went back to the stove where the eggs were bordering on a nice brown. You hummed as you plated them and sat at the table as you grabbed a fork, continuing to hum happily at Sans’s rock solid position against the wall. He hadn’t moved an inch.

“Not hungry?” You asked nonchalantly. Slowly Sans glared at you as his shocked arms fell to his side. Oh? Was he a bit miffed? Why did his anger look so cute on him? He very slowly walked back over to sit at the table pulling his phone back up to scroll on it.

While the idea of kissing you was nerve wracking, touching you in certain ways was more casual. Monsters were more easily into casualness with each other than intimate unless they were in a relationship. You just had to keep crossing these cultural lines you didn’t even know existed. The bone popping and the teasing were fine, they hinted at intimacy but didn’t actually lead anywhere. A kiss though, walking around in those damned socks even. What’s more he was finding himself easily excited about it.

Just what was happening?

“Oh c’mon Sans it was all in good fun!” You aimed a forkful of eggs at him playfully before popping them into your mouth. His sockets panned over to you dully.

“fun to you.” You snorted.

“You can’t be that upset, I mean I’m not mad over that kiss you stole.” He blushed and frowned, that was completely different. And he hadn’t purposefully stole it. Joking about it was fine but to compare something like that with what just happened irritated him. He knew it shouldn't but it did. Now he was lost on what exactly _you_ considered intimate or not. Your actions were bordering on that of a monster's but you obviously still thought along human lines to a degree. Which didn't help with his irritation.

“i think i’m starting to dislike you now.” You smirked.

“Really? Seemed like you were enjoying my buns a second ago.” He vanished before you could even blink, his plate of eggs sitting lonely and abandoned. You stared. Had you pushed too far? 

You sat there confused and at a loss.

Great.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HOLM GOT FANART! XD
> 
> By the talented Umiikoaqua :3  
> https://umiikoaqua.tumblr.com/post/184921202730/holm-update
> 
> And the awesome Niho <3  
> https://themsource.tumblr.com/post/184931272692/inspired-by-themsource-fanfiction-holm-the
> 
> Also I'm not linking that mashup...I really do despise it XD


	8. The Art of Touching

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HELLO~  
> I HAVE RETURNED AND OMG  
> 220 KUDOS!? I don't deserve those!  
> Honestly I'm sorry my hiatus was so long,  
> but I'm back!
> 
> That being said,  
> it'll probably take me a bit to get back into my posting rhythm!  
> So expect maybe 1-2 updates on each of my fics a month,  
> more if I get a roll going but keep the expectations low for now please! ^^;  
> IGCYLR is next to update then SIH for those of you that read them :P
> 
> ENJOY THE UPDATE!  
> HOPE IT WAS WORTH THE WAIT <3

It had been a while since Papyrus had seen his brother this lazy. Sans had barely left the house and his smoking had gone through the roof again. Something had happened. Now Papyrus, despite how great he was, wasn’t one to pry into his sibling’s business, he usually waited for Sans to come to him or to get out of his slump himself. He knew he was still smoking his pheromones like he was supposed to, if the smell from his room was any indication, but the way he’d fidget or stare at his phone for hours on end was worrying.

It was when he noticed his brother hadn’t eaten his spaghetti or snuck in some Grillby’s one night that he finally felt he had to intervene. It had been a while since Sans had gone so far as to not eat anything. Didn’t matter if they were skeletons, they could still starve. He pinched the bridge of his nasal socket as he stared at his brother and glared disapprovingly, his hands still wet from the abandoned dishes. Sans looked up at him and smiled awkwardly. He knew what was coming.

“SANS. WHAT HAPPENED?” That’s when he saw it, the way his brother’s eyelights slightly constricted and then brightened back up. Sans’s eyelights only did that when he’d been caught in the middle of one of his moods.

“don’t know what you mean bro.” Sans said with a carefree smirk as he subtly repocketed his phone. Something had definitely happened.

“Brother.” Papyrus’s tone was soft as worry creased his brow. Sans hated when that happened. It was usually followed by a series of phone calls and then a menagerie of friends all trying to cheer him up before inevitably the doctor was called. He didn’t intend on seeing any doctor till his next appointment.

“it’s hard to...i don’t even know what’s wrong.” Papyrus had a feeling he did.

“WOULDN’T HAPPEN TO BE A CERTAIN SISTER IN LAW WOULD IT?” Sans grimaced and that’s all Papyrus needed.

“JUST TALK SANS, IT’LL BE EASIER. YOU ALWAYS SPOKE EASIER WHEN YOU WERE TALKING.” Sans sighed.

“bro—“ Papyrus frowned.

“SANS,” The shorter monster looked at his brother wearily.

“TALK.” Sans stared at the floor and then back up at his sibling.

“xō tse chaydōza ā ĵo.” Papyrus waited patiently for his brother to continue but blinked once he realized Sans wasn’t going to.

“NO OFFENSE SANS BUT I FAIL TO SEE THE PROBLEM HERE.” Sans huffed in slight annoyance.

“ĵa dy dzo sūdzú.” Papyrus folded his arms and sighed, his own annoyance beginning to show.

“lú dú ĵúdzé ruṁa pūñūyúĵe.” Sans tried to ignore the flush of blue magic to his skull at his brother’s words and looked away from him. He didn’t act that way with you, did he? His mind flashed back to your kitchen and how you had pressed against him and he couldn’t help how his blush deepened. Papyrus smiled softly and placed a hand on his older brother’s shoulder.

“THOUGH I KNOW YOU AREN’T ONE FOR TALKING FEELINGS, MAYBE TRY NOT IGNORING HER ATTEMPTS AT REACHING YOU? I’M SURE IT WILL WORK OUT IF YOU PUT SOME EFFORT IN.” Sans sighed warily but gave a weak smile.

“sūyú xōtsā.” He snorted as Papyrus rolled his sockets and went back to the dishes. The sound of a chocobo from Sans pocket making him jump slightly. Maybe right this second wasn’t the right time to talk to you just yet. He pretended not to feel his sibling’s disapproving glare.

~~

You stared at the empty side of the bench blankly. This was the second Thursday Sans hadn’t shown up and it was…frustrating. He hadn’t answered a single text and when you had finally decided to straight up call him you had gone right to voicemail. You frowned, just where had you crossed the line that he was now avoiding you like the plague? Could monsters catch the plague? Honestly if there was a line to be crossed, you’d have thought being halfway in his body would’ve been it but apparently that was perfectly fine in comparison to…what exactly?

Ok, you had grinded on him a little and teased him just as he had teased you with that god awful music, but was that really something worth cutting off communication with you? You groaned as you felt the beginnings of a migraine coming on. You couldn’t do another Thursday without nicotine; you’d almost lost your job last week when Mrs. Green had made an impromptu visit and you had gone off after an hour of her chalk board screaming threatening to plant her to see if she could live up to her fucking name.

While you had to admit it had been hilarious at the time your boss had been severely unamused. Had you really become so dependent on Sans to be there for you on this day with a cigarette or pheromone waiting in the wings? So much for being a strong independent female! Bobby would—

You screwed your eyes shut forcefully as you took a shaky breath and then opened them again to eye the still empty seat of the bench blearily. At this point you would have normally said screw it; someone didn’t want you around then fuck’em. The _advantages_ to having apathetic depression. But for some reason this really _bothered_ you. You actually cared if your monster friend didn’t want you to be around for some reason.

How were you supposed to fucking fix this? You didn’t do apologies; you hadn’t done one in _years_. Hell, your words to Mark couldn’t even be counted as one when you’d had him committed. How did monsters even take apologies anyways? Would you be crossing another invisible line by just waltzing up and going ‘hey, sorry if I made you feel cheap or gave you a monster boner or something…remember when I teased you about your socks? You seemed pretty _chill_ about _that_!’

Ok, even your mental apology was sinking harder than the titanic. You sighed as you rose to your feet still eyeing Sans’s vacant spot. It was so empty.

 **Damnit**.

You decided to just give up and head back to work, your feet like lead as you walked. Your mind kept circling the interaction trying to exam it and figure it out, but you kept drawing a blank. Sans normally would’ve just explained where you were misinterpreting but from how he was acting now, you had definitely fucked up somewhere on a major scale. Was it the buns comment? He had vanished right after that, but it didn’t fit. You figured he probably would’ve just made a joke or pun on that. It had to be before that—

You pulled up short in the doors of the store as your mind slowly registered when exactly Sans had closed up on you. When you had mentioned him stealing a kiss.

_HOLY SHIT_

Normally most guys would brush off such a remark, maybe laugh about it, but Sans wasn’t normal, he was a monster. Had you inadvertently called him a monster rapist or something? You could’ve punched yourself if you weren’t certain your body would reflexively hold back your force at the last second to prevent real injury. But he had even teased you about it! So why did your comment set him _off_? This was too confusing, and there was only one way you’d get answers.

Your eyes landed on a shelf and you couldn’t suppress the small smile that crept up on your face. You sauntered over and lifted one of the items into the crook of your arm. Your boss wouldn’t mind if you took an extended break, right? Especially since you needed something to curb your habit. You sent your boss a quick text as you rung and checked yourself out right before heading straight back out the doors.

Which park was it that Sans worked at again?

It took almost an hour, but you finally found your way back to the park you’d found him last time, however something felt off. For some reason you got the vague impression he wasn’t there. You turned off the engine of your car and eyed the parks sidewalk from where you sat. Were you just psyching yourself out? How could you possibly be sure if he was here or not? You drummed your fingers on your steering wheel debating on if you should just go check anyways. You checked your phone.

He still had you on read.

No responses.

You tossed your phone into the passenger seat and got out of your car before you had a moment to change your mind. At first you walked then slowly you began to power walk, till finally you were in a full-on run. You didn’t pause for breath or to even rest till you crested the small hill and stopped. The playground was empty and there sat the cart you’d seen Sans at before, locked up tight. You panted weakly as you wandered over to it and stared at it.

It didn’t look like it’d been used for some time. Maybe since last you’d even seen him at it. You pinched the bridge of your nose and let out a shaky exhale. Damn, you were screwed. You didn’t realize just how much you had come to like having Sans around. How much you had been secretly lonely and had subconsciously clung to his friendship. You…you didn’t want to lose him. He made you feel when you were numb, he was very accepting and never pushy. Sans had the same habit you did and didn’t judge you for it. You hadn’t had such companionship since…Boston.

You let out a weak sob.

You always fucked _everything_ up.

Always hurt those you cared about most.

It was always better _not to care_ , not to _feel_.

You **knew** that.

And here your heart was being a dumbass. You didn’t want to go through this again. You didn’t want to finally care about something, someone and be the very reason they couldn’t stick around. Not again.

Rather by their choice or circumstances.

You let out another sob and stumbled, reflexively clutching onto Sans cart for balance. Your tears immediately stopped as your eyes widened. You had an inkling, a sense as something passed into you like a wave of energy. You looked around the park. Just where was city hall from here? With renewed vigor you rushed back to your car and didn’t hesitate as you jumped in, turned it on and pulled out. Your tires squealing as you left tread marks behind you. Thank lord, there weren’t any cops nearby.

It was almost a blur as you drove; flashes of a smiling face, short, choppy, black hair and coconut brown eyes staining your mind. You briefly rubbed the glossy film from your eyes that threatened to turn into tears. Your head was so fucked up and your heart was pounding when you finally pulled off and turned down the main street, the city hall building flashing as you passed it. Your eyes roamed frantically until they locked onto the park further down. Finding a spot to park wasn’t too much of an issue, other than the fact it was parallel parking. You’d _murder_ the person who invented _that_.

It took you all about five minutes of walking till you spotted the line of people.

There he was all smiles and antics as he flipped dogs midair and caught them expertly in their buns and whatnot. Seeing him suddenly put a perk in your step, took the ache out of your thundering heart. He seemed ok. Happy even. You allowed your breathing to even out and your heart to calm down as you eyed the people waiting for their food. Your eyes landed on a tall, burly man that looked like he’d stepped right out of the beauty and the beast, his little girl playfully running around him in circles. He was wide and tall enough to hide you.

You carefully snuck into line and found yourself grateful that you had a giant of a man shielding you from Sans’s sight. Just on the off chance he decided to try and vanish before you could even get close to him. You didn’t know why but that thought popped into your head blatant and searing. Sans hadn’t done that before unless you flustered him but right now you were in unfamiliar territory with him and your paranoia came across more sound then your rationality.

You were glad you had _listened_ to your paranoia. Because the moment he got done serving real life Gaston and his eyelights landed on you, his smile dropped and closed into a line.

Oh no. He had hidden the pearly whites.

Just how _fucked_ were you?

He had never looked at you like that before. Neutral and watchful, judging. Like he was deciding on rather or not it would be worth it to run or stay. You stared at him a moment and then abruptly tossed your purchase onto his counter. Sans slowly looked at it and lifted up the package, six shirts all with some kind of pun or joke on them and raised a bony brow as he looked back up at you curiously. You felt your cheeks heat up stubbornly.

“I don’t know how it works with monsters…but when you never respond to a text or phone call, we usually take that as being avoided.” Sans’s shoulders slumped slightly, his eyelights flickered down to the shirts he held and then to the few people behind you. You didn’t realize how nervous you felt until he looked back up at you and finally said something.

“give me a sec.” He said it with a faint blush tinting his cheeks. He wasn’t smiling but a blush was better than nothing. You nodded and stepped off to the side, finding an open bench to wait on. You tried not to feel upset that he was instantly smiling again as the next person stepped up and he served them. Why did _they_ get a smile? But it seemed forced. Duller. You did notice he wasn’t pulling anymore stunts or tricks as he finished off the line. Was he that upset you’d shown up like this?

Why the hell were you being so self-conscious about this whole thing?

As the last person received their food, Sans sighed and then stepped back, his cart locking and folding like the other one you had seen. You wondered how many of those carts he had briefly before you realized he was standing in front of you, the shirts tucked in the crook of his right arm and the other outstretched in offer. You looked up at him in confusion for a moment before standing and taking it. The world vanished and reappeared. He’d brought you both to your usual spot. You hoped you’d remembered to lock your car.

You let Sans sit first before you sat next, your eyes focused on the water. It was weird how you were feeling in that moment. It was a mixture of relief and apprehension, just a touch of happiness. He hadn’t turned you away or ran. For a strange reason the fact either of those hadn’t occurred spoke volumes to you. The silence stretched for a time before Sans finally sighed.

“i…didn’t mean to avoid you.” You looked over to him as he rubbed the back of his neck, his eyelights focused on the water just as yours had been. He let out a breath as he looked over and locked eyes with you.

“every text you sent i intended on answering but, i’d come up blank on what to say. i’m not…good with…voicing my thoughts too often.” You couldn’t help but smile at that, you could understand where he was coming from.

“Really? You seem pretty good at talking to me most of the time.” Sans shook his head with a thin smile.

“that’s different. that’s…” Sans let out a frustrated huff as he leaned forward and held the package of shirts between his hands, one of his thumbs rubbing it as he took a moment before responding. He kept his gaze on the object in his hands as he spoke.

“we haven’t ever had a…personal conversation y/n.” You hadn’t? You looked at the ducks as they paddled, your mind scanning every talk and word spoken to each other. It was then you realized all of your interactions had been casual if not somewhat playful. You’d both never had a serious moment together unless you counted how he’d come over to help you. Even that topic had been avoided though when he’d offered to listen, to let you vent. Wow. How long had you both been hanging out again? You looked at him sheepishly.

“Well, you don’t have to get personal if you don’t want to. Just explain like you always do and tell me where I fucked up.” Sans snorted.

“i’d have to get personal to explain why exactly i got upset, and you didn’t fuck up. i think i was content with what our dynamic was and well, getting personal can change that. i…read signals that weren’t even there thinking back on it. heh might’ve misunderstood our dynamic to.” You frowned. Signals? You had been teasing just like normal.

“Sans,” He oddly blushed but you kept speaking regardless. “I’m not…going to want to stop being around you if we…I mean I don’t mind if—“ You groaned as you leaned forward and placed your face in your hands. It was usually so easy to just spit your thoughts out so why the hell were you hesitating? It felt nerve wracking trying to get the words out. You hadn’t struggled to voice anything since you were seventeen. You kept your faced covered as your muffled words came out.

“I like having you around Sans. If we have to actually start getting to know each other to keep being us…” You sat up and smiled at him warily. “I can try.”

Sans’s sockets widened in surprise as he took in the genuine honesty in your expression. He had expected maybe some resistance, perhaps even you deciding it would be too much. Turns out there was more difference between you both than he’d thought and it was a good thing. Too much like him and this conversation would probably not be happening right now. He sighed as he shoved the shirts into his jacket pocket and slouched back against the bench.

“i got upset, that you made light of the…kiss that happened. yeah it wasn’t intended the way it should have been, hell i don’t even want to count it for the reason it happened, but you compared it to…kissing is vastly different from…touching.” You blinked. Was he seriously saying that the comparison of a kiss to grinding and fondling was insulting? And it suspiciously sounded like the latter was more acceptable. Was that how monsters viewed it? That was, some interesting priorities. Ok, it was back ASS ward if you were being honest compared to how humans worked.

“Ok. You’re gonna have to enlighten me as to _why_ a simple kiss, is a bigger deal then the _dance_ I performed on you.” Sans chuckled, some of his tension evaporating when it was apparent you weren’t going to go on a rant about it. Most humans usually did that when they were learning about this part of the culture.

“you humans have a saying, you know rather or not it’ll work out on the first kiss? kinda literal for monsters. intentions mean everything for us like i’ve said before.” He continued at your scrupulous look.

“kissing is more intimate than touching, with kissing it allows monsters to…feel each other. a way of connecting and feeling a soul’s intent easier. makes a very direct path without all the body stuff in the way. it’s also less… _committal_ than direct soul contact.” You raised a brow as the soul thing interested you but decided to latch onto the funnier statement in his words. Seriously, body stuff? Sounded like a sixth grader who didn’t like talking anatomy. Your eyes panned Sans briefly as you smiled at him.

“Body stuff?” Sans snickered at your pointed look.

“with monsters, we’re at most thirty percent physical matter. kissing and magic sharing comes easier. humans though with how low your inherent magic is, well to feel on the same level with a monster that another monster would be able to…kissing and sex are two of the best ways.” You balked and Sans had to fight to suppress his laughter.

“Kissing…and sex…” You watched the monster beside you shrug.

“intent is raw through those methods. Easier to have your defenses lowered and feelings take over. Otherwise monsters wouldn’t be able to get a grasp on humans without having to be drastic about it.”

“Soul play?”

“soul play.” He confirmed.

“I find that shocking, didn’t you say we used to be more in tune with magic? So, shouldn’t you be able to uh feel without that kind of thing?”

“i personally believe that your bodies just evolved this way in our absence, being cut off from large amounts of magic with only scant traces floating about? it’s like how humans fought poisoning attempts. small doses till you became immune.”

“Which is why you freaked out over me playfully offering a kiss but were fine with touching my ass...so touching is considered more…casual?” Sans shrugged even as he blushed in embarrassment.

“not trying to share intent so much as enjoying sensations. but it depends there too. being a skeleton there’s a lot more ways for intimate touching to occur because of how our bodies are. making direct contact to my magic for example is a, heh _boneified_ way to feel and feed direct intent from and to my soul.” You rolled his eyes at his pun but listened as he kept explaining.

“when you got caught in my ribs, if you had had any sexual intentions you could’ve…felt me on a personal level. that’s why it is considered intimate.” Your face turned five different shades of red in the span of seconds. Knowing the context now you probably should’ve just asked him to take his shirt off. If you had for even a moment thought about the way he could’ve used his bones on you, you could’ve…oh boy.

Sans noticed as you awkwardly shifted beside him, the weight of his words registering with you. He didn’t like having this conversation either; quite frankly he’d only had this talk three times before and had never wanted to have it again. But the way you were reacting at certain points left him secretly enjoying it. Watching humans turn pink was always an experience. Flustering you was a riot.

“i should probably ask, what you consider intimate exactly.” He stated suddenly. You looked at him curiously to which he clarified, “signals remember? kinda need to know so i don’t misread you in the future. you don’t act like a normal human female would so...” You supposed you didn’t. Not many chicks would do half the things you’d done with your monster friend just to bullshit around.

“Mm…I never really thought about it before. Like I know what’s supposed to be considered intimate but sexually physical stuff has always felt nothing but casual to me, unless you state otherwise. Like, you and I could have sex and I’d consider _that_ casual unless you were all like _I’m in love_ with you or something.”

“…huh…” You looked over at Sans’s bland tone and tensed up, his expression was intense and watchful and his eyelights were so focused on you it made your heart skip at the way they barely moved in his sockets. Like he was debating on something. You didn’t know how to take that. He didn’t think you just slept around all willy nilly or something did he? You had standards!...quickly fluctuating standards—nope! Don’t think about it!

Sans sockets lidded and he smiled. Your eyes instinctively going to his teeth. You’d be damned if he hadn’t somehow read where your mind was going with his Jedi face reading trick.

“y’know _tsūxa_ , that’s the second time you’ve mentioned having sex with me.” Your mind went blank. Of course, you just had to use you and him as an example for casual sex. Ok, you had walked into that one, and you felt yourself blush even as you smirked. If he was able to tease you, you were both alright. And that’s all you cared about.

“Sorry, was that rude? Guess you probably can’t do that being _bones_ and all.” Sans snorted as he raised a brow.

“who says I _can’t_?” Your teasing face automatically dropped as you looked at him curiously.

“Can you?” Sans looked at you coyly and wiggled his fingers.

“ _magic_.” You playfully frowned at him.

“Using your fingers isn’t really magic you know.” Sans gave you a measuring look as he spoke.

“sorry you had such awful lays that you would say that.” What!? You felt the playfulness fall away as you looked at him in disbelief. Rude!

“I’ll have you know, _boneboy_ , my radar for finding good lays has yet to fail me.” Sans smirked.

“oh, that why you keep mentioning sex with me? _flattered_. think I preferred you calling me _daddy_ though, not exactly a boy.” You like the idiot you probably were just couldn’t stop. The next few words that flew out of your mouth weren’t even thought about as you spewed them.

“The second I call you _daddy_ you might start _petting_ me. You’d just love that, wouldn’t you? Bet you’d love it if I asked you to ‘touch’ me.” You finger quoted the word touch and snickered as Sans’s eyelights went out. You were pretty sure most people would’ve been creeped out by that look but for you it meant victory! You smiled feeling more at ease again and then realized you hadn’t eaten today. Crap, you were still on break too! Maybe if you went for food and sent a pic to your boss, he wouldn’t be so harsh on you?

“Hey Sa—“ You went to ask if he wanted to get something and froze. Your friend was staring at you, his eyelights back and slightly hazed looking, blurry around the edges. That was…you swallowed. That look for some reason made your whole body shake with a shiver. What was this monster doing to you!? No, what was your stupid brain doing!? He leaned over to you and gripped you chin as he smiled. 

His phalanges were so warm.

“ **ask me**.” Your world stopped. Had your blood always sounded that loud as it ran through your veins? Because at that moment it sounded like someone had ran over and started just banging away on a snare drum.

“Ask you?” You echoed dumbly. Sans sockets lidded again and this time you felt a faint rumble from him as he moved slightly closer. Was…was he still teasing you?

“scared?” He asked smugly. For some reason he knew just what to say to make you switch from confused and nervous to defiant and challenging. He was going to kill you one day. Or get you to inadvertently kill yourself from your own stupidity. But you seriously couldn’t see the harm in rebutting him, he always chickened out at the moment you played it up anyways so why would now be different? You leaned into him, your face close in proximity as you batted your lashes.

“Touch me, bone _daddy_.” Sans’s face turned a vibrant blue as his smile faded into a closed expression, his sockets lidding in a fashion that made your toes curl just to look at. Then he surprised you by smiling. Wait…smiling? Before you could question it, he shrugged and lifted you effortlessly into his lap where he had you straddle him. Your legs bent and braced against the bench beneath him. You blinked.

“Uh…” Well shit he had definitely caught you off guard.

“if you insist.” Sans muttered lazily as his hands slid up under the hem of your shirt and rested on your waist. You considered everything casual huh? Who was he to object then to some fun between friends. Don’t mind if he indulged.

Ok, he wasn’t backing down.

You went to say something, but the words died in your throat as you felt his phalanges press firmly into your sides and move upward. The pressure from them was enough that you groaned at how they massaged and simultaneously dug into you. Tension in your muscles relaxed and heat shot along you from his touch. You could already feel your skin welting from the contact.

You blushed brighter than a lighthouse as a small groan slipped out.

“hmm, have I ever told you that monsters have a higher sense of smell than normal?” You looked down at him in confusion and jerked as his hands landed at your ribs and stopped. You took a breath and then moaned filthily as his thumbs gently pressed into the bottom of your ribcage and traced the bones beneath your flesh with small circles. It sent delicious sparks through your nerves and made you shake at how easily he was navigating you. Damn his fingers _were_ magic!

“we typically have a 60 times larger olfactory complex, meaning…I can smell how much you’re enjoying this.” He winked playfully as his hands moved backwards and up, tracing the back of your ribs to the front as his fingers poked and prodded at the hidden bone while his semblance of a palm rubbed along your skin enough to ease the muscle beneath it. It was like a deep tissue massage bordering on foreplay!

“W-what do I smell like?” He cocked a brow as he smiled. Oh, that was the smart thing to ask sure! Not the fact why he was currently stroking and groping you. Realistically though, how long had it been since you’d been touched last? You honestly weren’t complaining like you knew you probably should’ve been. Then Sans really turned up the heat by leaning in and pulling you closer to him, planting his face in the crook of your neck. You gasped as he sucked in a deep breath and exhaled, his warm breath prickling your skin.

“like coconut and raspberries.” He slurred as he ran a finger down the center of your spine making you arch into him as it made your whole body shudder. Sans had almost forgotten how soft humans were, far softer than monsters with more body than he and his brother had. The way your skin gave to the pressure of his phalanges made him hum appreciatively. Back when he’d attempted a relationship with Tori he remembered marveling at how _squishy_ she was, how _warm_. But the first time he had been with a human…it had _blown his world_.

There was just something to the way your race was, how your skin _tinted_ and _bruised_ into various _colors_ and _shades_ , how _solid_ your bodies felt but still maintained a _softness_ that magic just couldn’t mimic. He chuckled as he felt your body shiver as he ran the tips of his thumbs beneath where your bra settled, applying pressure enough that it made you jolt. Who knew his smoke buddy was slightly ticklish?

You playfully slapped his shoulder as you yelped, ignoring his devious snicker at your expense. Really tickling? Right _now_?

“thought your funny bone was in your arm.” He commented casually. Despite yourself you snorted.

“Thought, did you? Figured you’d actually know since you’re a _scientist_.” He raised a brow as he lowered a hand to your upper thigh and gave a pointed squeeze making a moan slip out. This asshole! You glared and he looked positively smug.

“was tsūxa. don’t seem to be forgetting how human _anatomy_ works though.” He moved his hands to your rear and pulled your hips flush against him, the feeling of him nestled so well against you making your blush deepen.

“want to _confirm_ that for me?” His tone came out dangerously husky as his hands moved up to your sides and circled to your back, his palms dragging downwards with deliberate slowness. You tensed. You didn’t know how far he was aiming to take this game of his but he was approaching territory he probably wasn’t prepared for. You opened your mouth to warn him.

“S-sans wai—“ Then he hit it. The sweet spot right in the middle of your lower back that always made your body break out into shocks and shuddering. Only you were _already_ revved. Sans had already built you to a point that all it took was a firm press and you threw your head back in a strangled groan as your body locked and your hips forcibly bucked against him even as your hands rushed to grab at him.

Sans was wide eyed as your hands touched him, one gripping his jacket and the other…accidentally curled into his _clavicle_ where his shirt had dipped thanks to your body thrusting against him. Your fingertips _brushing_ against his hidden magic.

His hands tightened on you as his eyelights went out and his skull bowed and pressed against your stomach. His magic surged and he gritted his teeth trying to stop the moan as he shared the wave of your pleasure. His vision tunneling from repressed _wave after wave_ of pent up _need_. How long had you gone without any satisfaction!? He felt like he was drowning at the onslaught of heat and spasming that shot through him from you.

A vortex of emotions and sensations flooding his senses, from pure unadulterated bliss to a deep forlorn sadness that gave way to embarrassment as searing heat and pulsing coolness chased it. It was _intoxicating_ how it felt mixing into his magic and running through his bones, it was purely _you_. 

~~It was addicting~~. 

Then grief.

So much _grief_. Why was there so much of it?

 ~~His poor tsūxa~~.

Wait…

_WHAT!?_

It was fast and violent, it was quick and he found himself gasping as his bones all pressed in and then relaxed, the spaces where his magic held them in place loosening. He couldn’t focus enough to examine the stray thought that had shot through his head, he was too spent and worn as he came down from the shared ecstasy. His mind already turning weak in the afterglow.

He had forgotten how intense human orgasms were.

You panted and looked down right as he leaned back and looked up at you, his eyelights large and blown as they took in the dark flush of your face. You stared at him in a daze and smiled awkwardly before you chuckled. You couldn’t bring yourself to feel guilty. Noticing your hands, you quickly withdrew them.

Oops. Looked like he might’ve had some fun to. You smirked at him.

“I take it back, that was _definitely_ magic.” Sans continued to stare before he smiled almost droopily.

“heh.” You looked around the both of you and then back at him.

“Didn’t know you had a public kink though.” Sans turned navy; it was fucking adorable. And then you felt anxious as your mind wandered, probably from the high dose of oxycontin you’d gotten or some other chemical because you smiled with a gentle reserve that wasn’t normal for you. With uncertainty.

“Hey, we’re ok right?” Sans frowned as he looked up at you, his eyelights shrinking back to their normal size and brightness.

“yeah of course we are…” And then he suddenly felt a knot form in his nonexistent gut.

“you didn’t…” He couldn’t bring himself to ask. You looked at him curiously.

“Didn’t what?” Sans stared at you quietly in a neutral expression, one he wore when trying to read you. Slowly he shook his head.

“nothing.” He muttered, his eyelights shifting off to the side. He couldn’t bring himself to ask but…you hadn’t let him _touch_ you, just because you felt you might _lose_ him, had you? Because you still thought he’d been _angry_? He didn’t want to think you were that type of girl. After all, how well did you really know each other? Not at all.

Sans was at a loss, even as you smiled warmly at him.

He didn’t dare think back on the direction his mind had gone but a few moments earlier.

“Anyways I was trying to see if you wanted to get something to eat, kinda killed my lunch break though.” You joked as you swung off his lap and onto your feet, which almost gave out because they were basically useless still, you felt really wrung out. Sans was quick to stand and support you as he chuckled.

“eh, we can grab a bite. i’ll take you back to work to save you some time, seeing as you’re intent on _falling_ for me.” He winked. You rolled your eyes playfully.

“You realize for humans it supposed to be seduction before the orgasm, right?” He smirked.

“you’re not most humans.” You blushed against your will and huffed as you looked away from him.

This smooth bastard.

Sans could only force a smile as he dragged you both into the void.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Translations:  
> Sans: (I like[care]about her.)  
> Sans: (she’s just a friend)  
> Papyrus: (You behave like a couple.)  
> Sans: (cold brother)
> 
> Thanks to cuddlyquiche for beta reading for me!  
> Also art from Umiikoaqua!  
> https://umiikoaqua.tumblr.com/post/185184533725/sketches-based-in-the-last-chapter-of-holm


	9. A Lesson on Sans

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 275 Kudos Just wow...  
> And it's only 9 chapters in...  
> Guys...My heart UGH <3
> 
> Thank you,  
> For the support and your patience while I've dealt with life and my other fics!  
> I hope you enjoy the update,  
> The next one I'm going to particularly love writing! (￢‿￢ )

“do it.”

“No.”

“c’mon, i’ll bring out that new pheromone i got if you need the courage.” You eyed the bear monster as he took a bite of his steak, his serene gaze focused on his meal across the way. While you had to admit it was interesting to see more monsters roaming around there was no way you were just going to waltz up to one. Not unless you needed a cig or something because that was your track record for meeting monsters so far.

“New pheromone huh? What kind?” Sans chuckled.

“it’s a confidence one, y’know, what you seem to be lacking right now.” Was that a burn? That definitely felt like a burn. Ouch you didn’t know he could be so cruel.

“it’ll be five seconds, not that hard to do.” He joked with a roll of his sockets. If it wasn’t that hard then why couldn’t he simply do it? He was just teasing you again you knew it. In fact you were pretty sure his whole goal in this friendship was to simply see how far he could go on embarrassing you. You snorted.

“I don’t care what you offer me Sans, I’m not walking up to some rando and proclaiming that I know The Legendary Fart Master…can you even fart?” Sans looked at you dully.

“you’re asking if i can fart?”

“Yep.”

“seriously?” He raised a brow.

“Pretty sure I am.” You teased.

“i can fart.”

“Oh really? Do it now.” Sans snorted.

“you’re asking me to fart on demand?”

“Yep!”

“what is this pay-per-sound?”

“You’re stalling, I knew it, you can’t fart!” Sans looked mildly offended.

“i’ll have you know y/n i once cleared a room, do you want that? you want me to clear out this restaurant just to prove a point?” You smirked. That would be a sight to see, people running out in shock over the fact a skeleton could emit a nauseous gas would be hilarious to you. Yep you did indeed want that.

“To test my theory on rather a skeleton who lacks insides and an exterior can fart, let alone claim title as Legendary Fart Master? Gladly.” You drawled with a falsely dignified tone. Sans rolled his sockets mischievously.

“ok, if you insist.” You watched him for a long moment as he slouched into his seat, his grin wide and mirthful as he brought up a hand and wiggled his fingers. You ignored your blush as your mind inadvertently flashed to how well he could use those, and watched with a raised brow as he slowly slid it into his jacket. He wasn’t honestly about to—

**_Phbbbbt!_**

Your eyes went wide and you couldn’t help the laughter as a few tables all turned to look at the both of you in disgust. This skeleton had just made a fake fart with his armpit, there’s no way that counted! It took you a few seconds to catch your breath before you could say as much, Sans’s grin smug the whole time.

“That’s not a fart!” Sans snickered.

“think a few of the patrons would disagree.” He nodded towards a pair that had abruptly stood to leave. You shook your head, it wasn’t the stampede of fleeing people you had gleefully imagined but it was something.

“How did you even do that? You don’t have a technical armpit.” With a proud flourish Sans withdrew his hand and waved a deflated whoopee cushion. They seriously still made those? Okay you had to give him some points for effort there. You chuckled begrudgingly.

“Fine, but I wouldn’t call you a fart master, maybe a fart enthusiast.” Sans gripped his chest in mock hurt.

“i spent years earning that title!” You took an extended sip of your milkshake and smiled smugly.

“Sans, I could probably earn that title in a few seconds, y’know seeing as I can actually fart. Do you want that?” Sans seemed to contemplate for a moment before lidding his sockets and smirking. And for once you were the mind reader, because there was no way you were going to follow through with what he was about to ask. 

You might not be a typical human in his book but you still had some decorum. Because you had to have something that’d help you survive in society damnit! Even if you didn’t typically give a care either way on a good day.

“I’m not going to fart for you.” Sans’s smile instantly dropped.

“have you know that’s called being a _tease tsūxa_.” You snickered. He had just made it sound like you’d denied him foreplay. Sans kept surprising you, you didn’t realize he was such a gremlin. Could you get him to wear a costume of one? That would be a sight you could die laughing and happy to.

“Thought you liked it when I teased you bone daddy?” Sans blushed as he took a pointed bite out of his sub. It was nice to know Sans wasn’t the kind of guy to suddenly become immune to flustering just because he inadvertently--

Don’t think about it. 

“you work today?” Sans asked casually, as you pulled up your phone to check it and distract yourself from your wandering thoughts. Which wasn’t really working but you refused to blush and give it away to jedi face reader across from you.

“Nope, Harry’s Handies is closed for renovation.” Sans raised a brow.

“another name change huh?”

“Don’t ask, I have no clue why he changes it every couple of weeks.” You had two theories actually; one being to keep the mundaneness of having the same store name over and over away, or just simply because he constantly forgot to put the stores proper name when doing the paperwork. Based on how often he asked you how to spell the name you were guessing the latter.

“heh you humans and needing to name things.” It was your turn to raise a brow.

“You skeletons and needing to fart.” Sans snorted but didn’t comment as he finished off his food. You looked up as your waitress sauntered over and laid down the bill before quickly turning and walking away. While you had to admit it was nice you both hadn’t gotten name called today unlike last time it still bugged you how openly hostile people could be. Honestly they acted like Sans would eat them, which made little to no sense seeing as he ordered like a decent human being—er monster.

You didn’t say anything as you slid your phone into a pocket and glanced at the bill.

Thirty seven ninety five. Your buddy just had to have a five meat sandwich with three layers of cheese and multiple toppings. Only ten of this was _your_ food. This as the fourth time you’d gone out to eat together but already you weren’t surprised anymore after the first stunt of this he pulled.

Slowly your eyes panned up to the skeleton monster who currently had his chin resting in his palm, his sockets wide and expecting. He knew what you were about to ask. You could see it in those piercing eyelights of his. The very sight of them smug and relaxed. You contemplated not falling for his obviously planned response but decided to anyway. He’d just come up with a way to use it later if food got brought up so might as well take the bullet and go for it now.

“You paying this time?” You drawled with a dead panned expression. He grinned.

“put it on my tab.” You rolled your eyes. Like you’d willingly start an IOU tab with him, you had the sneaking suspicion he wouldn’t pay it back for some time. If at all. And hey, what gave him the impression you would become his willing food bank!?

“You don’t have a tab!” He leaned back with a shrug.

“forgot my wallet.”

“Haha…funny. You owe me this time.” You said simply as you pulled out the cash and tossed it on top of the check. You saw a penny roll away but decided the waitress could lean over and grab it. She wanted to be rude you could be to. Sans lazily stood and followed you out, his tone relaxed.

“owe you huh?”

“Yep. We may be friends but I don’t support mooching.” At least not since you’d given it up years ago as soon as you were able to. Sans snickered.

“however will I pay you back?” You could think of a few things, such as actually buying the food next time you both went out. Seriously the more you both had started to hang out together the quicker you were noticing how lazy and carefree he was. Not that that seemed to deter you or make you any less enthused with your budding friendship, but you were really starting to feel for Papyrus. 

Somehow on your last visit a new sock had made it’s home next to an older, crustier and sticky note covered one by their television. Papyrus had simply sighed and added a note to the new one with a frown.

Your sympathy for the lankier sibling had died quickly however when he’d made you mac and cheese that night...more like block-a-noddle. The pasta had been blown to overcooked proportions and the cheese had become like a blackened cement. You still managed to eat it. 

Yep Sans definitely owed you a paid meal.

“Well, seeing as I’ve picked where to eat this whole time how about you choose for dinner tonight?” Sans gave a cursory glance upward in thought before giving a shrug.

“sure, papyrus is staying over at undyne’s so i was planning on going out anyways.” You looked at him with raised brows.

“Going out?” Sans hummed.

“yeah, i go out when i know for sure papyrus won’t be home. i love him but sometimes i like to grab a bite to eat of some good food...and maybe a few drinks.” You honestly couldn’t picture Sans as the type to be scouring bars. You tried to picture Sans even trying to flirt it up with other people but with how lazed and withdrawn he had been when you’d first met it just wasn’t clicking for you, though knowing him better he certainly had a type of confidence about him that you could envision would be a real hit with the ladies.

Why did that suddenly make you uncomfortable to think about? You didn’t even realize you had stopped walking. Your face turned into a scowl, why would it matter to you who he hit on or not? Who got to see him all bare boned--the shimmer of his magic adding a pearlescent shine to the stark whiteness of his body in a way that--whoa!

You were getting carried away.

Where the hell had that come from? You blinked and noticed Sans had stopped walking, he was currently standing right in front of you with a neutral expression. It made you tense. He was using his face reading trick on you. Do not blush y/n--don’t do it--damnit! 

You knew you had failed the moment your cheeks had heated up, and Sans tilted his head in...amusement? 

Yep you were pretty sure he was finding whatever was on your face humorous. You forced a smile to try and hide what you were sure he had already found. To your mortification he grinned wide, those pearly whites you had come to admire shimmering almost with a twinkle of mischievousness.

“something on your mind?” He teased innocently with raised brows and lidded sockets. Ha! Jokes on him, there was no way you were about to voice a single syllable of your thoughts. No amount of flashing teeth or smug looks would dissuade you! You let your lips curl into a cheshire grin, his own look going wary as you threw him with the unexpected expression.

“I was wondering...where we’d be going for our date tonight.” Sans’s eyelights went out as his face flushed navy.

“d-date?” Uh oh. You had only meant it jokingly. But with how his posture had stiffened it sent you flashing back to his reaction in your kitchen. 

Was dating not casual in the monster society, something just friends would even do? You scrambled for what to say but Sans spoke first, his hurried tone making you jolt.

“grillby’s!...is where we’re going.” You stared at him frozen as you tried to gauge him; Sans was still blushing but not as fiercely, his eyelights had returned fixed at some point off to the side but the way his smile strained and how his posture seemed forced into it’s usual slouch sent red flags up for you. You coughed awkwardly.

“Sans...I was just kidding.” You kept your voice gentle, easy, afraid to upset him. For some reason that didn’t seem to reassure your skeletal friend in the slightest, his eyelights flickered over to you and you swore for the briefest moment a flash of disappointment passed by in their depths. Then almost as if from left field his body relaxed, but his face became an annoyed grimace.

“you don’t have to talk like that.” He snapped. 

Your eyes widened. What was the sudden reaction for? He looked defensive and _hostile_. This was completely different from anything you’d seen of him, even when he’d been upset it had never been to this degree. He acted like you were attacking him. You’d be hesitant to say it didn’t hurt seeing him look at you that way.

In fact it kind of offended you. But this was Sans, your smoking punny pal with hands of magic. You couldn’t picture him purposefully meaning to upset you, even when you’d upset him over the kiss fiasco. 

“Like what?” You asked in genuine confusion. 

“like i’m fragile.” You fell silent. All you could do was look at Sans and watch as he readjusted a foot, looked away from you with a dullness in his eyelights. You took a breath and went for the gamble. Worst that could happen was he ignored you for a while and you bought him more shirts. Because you’d be damned if anything chased that grinning skull out of your life--

Focus on Sans.

“How often?” He looked back at you numbly, a silent exchange and understanding passing between you. It made something inside your chest go tight. The things you both weren’t talking about resonating as you realized below his cheerfulness, was a pit just as deep and dark as yours. You wondered, what his scars were in comparison.

“all the time.” He whispered. You made a noise of acknowledgement. With how Sans was you imagined he had a lot of friends, didn’t know if Papyrus was his only family or not. But that was a damn sight more of people tiptoeing, trying to plaster on fake smiles or empty reassurances than what you were sure you had to endure if at all. It was both a luxury and a curse for you.

“Welp,” You smiled grimly. “It’s nice to know we have another thing in common. Didn’t think I’d meet someone fucked up too.” 

“congratulations.” Sans drawled. 

“Thanks, think it’s safe to say Witzelsucht.” Sans stared at you in confusion for a moment before slowly chuckling, his humor growing louder till he was full on laughing. You couldn’t even help how contagious it was and ended up joining him, both of you almost choking on the awful joke.

“w-was that a double pun?” He asked with a fitful gasp. 

“It tried to be!” You replied breathlessly. You both continued to laugh like mad men for a bit longer, ignoring the passing looks of concern that strangers shot at you. Ironically those glances only made you laugh harder which in turn triggered Sans at how high your voice had gone.

“stars you sound like a banshee!” He wheezed.

“And you sound like a broken muffler!” You were both suffocating practically by the time your cries of joy died down enough to let you breath. Your staggering chuckles died and you both looked at each other with grins that threatened to crack your faces.

“wizelsucht...now that’s a stretch even for me.” Sans commented with a playful shake of his head. You begged to differ, in fact you were pretty sure that might be a medical condition he actually had but decided not to say as much. You were just happy he wasn’t dwelling anymore. It was something you’d have to remember for the future, _don’t try to baby the skeleton_.

“Guess you have work today?” You asked as you both resumed walking. Sans shrugged. 

“nah, not really. i do have a favor to do, friend of mine is getting married right now, supposed to be there in a bit to take their pictures for them.” You looked at him.

“Uh, shouldn’t you be there for you know...the wedding?” 

“should, but not into human weddings--no offence.” 

“Let me guess, monster weddings are better?” You asked curiously as you both entered the path to the park, following it absently as you talked. Sans smiled as his face took on the expression he usually wore when ‘educating’ you. 

Utterly rapt and excited. Such a let down really, he would make an awesome teacher or professor you realized. Surprisingly, you could see a suit sitting well on his bones. 

You also silently wondered if his issues tied into the fact that he was a former scientist selling vegan hot dogs.

“more intimate if you ask me, all humans do is proclaim they love each other and then sign some paperwork. in monster weddings well, you soulbond.” You grimaced. Wasn’t soul touching basically monster sex? Was he telling you monsters had sex in front of their guests? What kind of 6th century AD shit was that!? 

Sans caught your shock and snickered.

“not the same thing tsūxa. soulbonding isn’t soul play...not usually anyway. soulbonding is the exchange of magic not the stimulation of it. how it works in a wedding is both partners bring out their souls and merge them while declaring their intentions in their natural languages. once that’s done the souls separate but now carry a mark of their partner. each mark is unique to the individual.” You tilted your head in thought as you both drew near to your usual spot, waiting for Sans to sit first before taking your own place. For some reason it felt off to sit first, maybe the nostalgia of how you’d both first met? But a soul mark, you wondered if yours would be a plume of smoke or something.

“Sounds still similar to a wedding, except being pen to paper it’s soul to soul.” Sans hummed as he withdrew a yellow colored joint from inside his coat, rolling it absently between his phalanges as he collected his thoughts on how to continue explaining.

“when the soulbonding happens...guests present get to see flashes of the people bonding. bits of memory displaying their love and reasonings for that love. like an echo of magic as it overflows between them.” Sans spoke slowly as he stared off in contemplation.

“Like...a light show you mean?” Sans snorted as he shot you a sideways smile.

“kinda.” You frowned.

“It sounds beautiful but...invasive?”

“the guests don’t see everything, geez no one would have a monster wedding if that happened. imagine, everyone coming together to support you and getting traumatized because they got a ‘live show’ if you get my drift.” You giggled imagining the scandal.

“Sure sounds like grounds for divorce.” Sans pulled out his lighter with a lazy smile.

“if they’re able to. only way a soulbond can be broken without consequences is if the pair aren’t soulmates.” You felt a small flutter in your chest at the term soulmate. For some reason you felt a brief flash of excitement, that left you almost reeling. It was like you’d gone on a roller coaster ride and had just rode the first plummet! 

That left you bewildered...and odd. 

“What are soulmates Sans?” Sans's sockets went half mast as his expression became wistful, sad almost? It was hard to try and understand it. He lowered the lighter and joint letting them rest against his knees as he eyed the lake in front of him. Something about him suddenly felt off, distant.

It clicked. 

This was Sans _vulnerable_. It left you feeling perturbed. His signature smile lifted slightly in the corner, making the bone near his nasal cavity scrunch up adorably. It conflicted with the vibe coming off of him.

“soulmates...are two people who’s souls share a similar connection, yet one lacking what the other can provide. souls made for each other.” You ignored how your heart slammed in your chest at the way his usual baritone came out light and airy. He sounded absolutely enamored. And it left you surprisingly uncomfortable.

“That sounds…” Your breath hitched. “Horrifying actually.” Sans raised a brow and fully looked at you, his face slipping beneath a calm and observing mask. You quickly realized he had noticed your reaction. It was time to invest in some professional acting classes.

“oh?” Awkward. How to explain without sounding completely stupid, and scared.

“The thought of not being able to choose, y’know, not being able to choose who your match is. Who you love or want to spend your life with.” Sans was silent as he looked back at the lake, his expression contemplative. 

“you can choose.” You waited for him to continue, mildly thrown off because what he had described had sounded nowhere near something like a choice.

“just because you’re made for each other, doesn’t mean you have to be together. what you should be asking though…” Sans looked back at you with such an intensity it sent a shiver of ice through you, a scrutiny so palatable you could taste it.

Suddenly your friend turned into a stranger, and it left you petrified under his judgmental gaze.

“is why wouldn’t you want to be? to be with someone who makes all of your weaknesses strengths, to fill the gap of loneliness with solid and unwavering companionship, to feel utterly content knowing no matter how bad the day, how wretched life treats you, there is that person who understands _completely_ and _consoles_ even if they’re not able to be with you in that moment.” Sans doesn’t blink once, his eyelights locked on you as his voice lowered.

“is it really so horrifying for life to have provided such a person? so what if you don’t get to choose who they are, what’s that matter in the face of undying and unfathomable love and fulfillment?” His hardened eyelights diffused slightly as his sockets softened around the edges, the feeling of his critical stare turning unguarded and open. And you could see a weakness there that reflected a secret you couldn’t interpret.

You were speechless, your words struck from you like a slap to the face.

Sans kept his focus on you, the objects in his hands forgotten as a gentle breeze brushed by the both of you, lifting your hair and jostling his coat in its wake. If you hadn’t been completely swept away by his words you would’ve compared the moment to a scene straight out of an anime or comic book. Things that shouldn’t realistically happen but were doing so anyway. 

~~And it shocked you how much you hoped you were the heroine.~~

“Do you...have a soulmate Sans?” He didn’t answer you right away, his eyelights still remaining locked on you but slightly hazing around the edges. It made your breath catch in your lungs. Finally he smiled casually, bringing the joint back up to his mouth to light it.

“yep,” You felt a twinge of nausea. “and so do you, everyone does...somewhere.” You let out the breath you had held right as he inhaled his from the smoke between his teeth. Why were you feeling this way? You watched as he chuckled, the effects from what he was smoking making him almost smug.

“did i rattle your bones tsūxa?” You answered by simply plucking the joint from his mouth, ignoring his teasing grin and taking a hit. Sans didn’t hesitate to follow you as you were drug under.

You were spinning, a dazzling array of lights spilling around you as countless cries and cheers echoed from behind them unseen but felt as you moved your body. Suddenly the music cut out and switched tracks to a song you recognized. Can you feel my bones started to play as Rain fell suddenly, drenching you as Sans materialized from the falling water, his usual attire replaced with a similarly colored hoodie and sweatpants.

The lights cascaded around you and wrapped your body, pixelating and enlarging into a dress of white and blue. Your skin prickled as Sans whistled shamelessly.

He pulled you into him and twirled you into a dip, his smile gloating yet gentle beneath a cyan colored blush. It sent a wave of tender emotion through your very being. You laughed as he pulled you back up and then tossed you into the air, no dropped you into it as the world flipped and you slid into his arms again but this time he was different, dressed in red and black with a sharp grin, a golden tooth flashing.

The world around you awash in sparkling droplets of paint and chains.

He leaned in as he continued to dance with you, singing the song into your ear that continued to play. A sense of euphoria rushed as he pulled back and his crimson red eyelights expanded, a world of red surrounding and cocooning you into a drop that slid and traced along a bandaged cheekbone, utter adoration drowned you. 

The drop burst into a light spectrum of color dragging you away from a set of mismatched eyelights that followed you, to fall into an oncoming planet of pure green crystalline water. 

You arched into the sparking depths that bathed you, the feeling of textured hands running along your sides made you smile, there was no latent desire, only the realization that despite your smallness in comparison to the vastness around you, still something reached out towards your very existence.

Something deemed you worth it’s attention and it left you wanted. 

Though you couldn’t see what held you, you were drowned in the fact that it was for you. Sans’s words echoed around you as the water swirled and then shot up, a sea of jewels and precious stones flooding your vision, the air you breathed a toxic combination of oxytocin and endorphin that made you feel one with the universe itself. 

You were just as valuable as the intricately cut ruby beside you, just as mesmerizing as the opal’s shimmer, you gasped at how you felt on par with the naturally mixed and twisting gold weaving between each gem and rock. You felt a hand on your arm and you were drifting down, down, farther than should be possible.

An intense luminescence sprang forward, a heart colored in pure sapphire blue floated in your cupped palms. It’s glow wrapped around you and embraced you like a long lost friend. You sighed happily and held it tightly to your chest as you floated among a sea of black, dazzling white clouds passing you by and shaping into figures you couldn’t distinguish but upon a glance gave you security and reassurance.

The soul in your hand grew and lulled you into a serene sleep, one that surged a feeling of completeness. You felt yourself fall backwards into a pair of waiting arms, their contact flooding you with a cocktail of emotions. You could take on the world, you could fear no judgment, life was yours and for you alone to enjoy and live! The right to laugh and to cry needing no foundation or reasoning.

Strength flooded your arms and legs, you were powerful. Velvety smoothness drenched your skin, you were beautiful. Giddiness curled within your body, you were humor and joy. Warmth and light surged within your chest, you were wholly and completely yourself. A kaleidoscope of bones and tobacco swarmed your senses and it left you rejuvenated.

The world held no control over you, and you could face it with the confidence of a million suns. 

You slowly opened your eyes.

You looked over at Sans beside you on the bench and felt your mouth fall open. His eyelights were huge! You didn’t realize they could take up more than half his sockets. He blinked slowly and smiled once he realized you had come down from the trip. 

He looked positively blissful.

“Pretty.” You said still struck by how huge his eyelights were. Was he choosing to do that? Sans smirked.

“not bad yourself.” You felt like there was a deeper meaning to that other than your base looks, otherwise why would you be blushing so furiously at the comment? But you couldn’t pin why. A sound from Sans's pocket jostled the both of you and he yawned upon seeing it.

“looks like it's picture time.” He took another hit before passing the still lit smoke to you, a thick cloud of yellow shooting out his nose as he stretched. You breathed deep on the pheromone right as Sans spoke.

“speaking of, do you not like pictures? noticed you don’t keep any around your place.” Your response was automatic.

“Don’t like seeing myself.” _Or the ones I hurt_. You frowned and stared at what you were smoking. Usually you hated talking about this subject but apparently mister emotional drug made you feel like you could speak without hesitation. You felt completely in tune with your validation regarding it without a hint of your usual guilt or trepidation. 

Sans saw the unspoken words flash across your face, but decided not to push, instead he said--

“shame. i’d have pictures of you everywhere.” You pulled up short and looked at him, Sans didn’t have even a hint of a blush instead he was shamelessly staring at you with a look close to the one he had given you in post cloi--

Nope.

Huh, seemed confidant Sans was a bit of a flirt, more so than normal at least.

“Want one?” You found yourself offering, normally you wouldn’t have but with the pheromone still coursing through you it was something rather easy to say. Sans snickered as he lifted up his cellphone and pulled you into him, his arm limply around your shoulders.

“sure i could always use another one.” Another one? You shot him a look as it registered that he had saved the photo you’d sent him before, right as the camera sounded. Sans laughed as he glanced down, his smirk was smug at the camera while you had a galling look of shock directed at him.

The other pic was enjoyable on its own merits, but this one had just become his favorite. He had no shame as he saved it as his lock screen. You watched him do it and found yourself rolling your eyes playfully. That was kind of cute.

“Still have the pajama one huh? Please tell me it’s not the reason behind your growing sock pile in the living room.” Sans snorted, more so at the dry tone you used than the actual question as he tucked his phone within his jacket pocket. 

“want to tag along?” His avoidance was a clear admission. You were going to enjoy using it as ragging material later when the pheromone had worn off. When you could get him to turn that beautiful shade of navy.

You should be embarrassed you just thought that. But you weren’t! It was true his magic was an enticing shade. Could you find socks in that color to send him as a prank? Boy this pheromone was dangerous. Focus y/n, focus!

“Can I?” Sans stood up taking the joint back from you for one last puff before tapping it out and placing the rest of it back inside his coat. Oh he saved them? That was responsible you supposed, then again this was his medicine. You bit your cheek to keep from asking about that.

Courage pheromone, more like nosy pheromone. Yep you were definitely never partaking of this one again.

“don’t see why not, it’s a human wedding like i said. not as intimate, honestly don’t care either way if you can or can’t anyways.” You blinked as you rose to your feet, his hand stretching out in offer as he winked. Sans courageous was so blunt and smug, almost rude. You liked it, it was like picturing him as a bad boy. Forget the socks you were going to send him a golden tooth just like the vision you’d had of him.

You barely clasped his hand before the world vanished and reappeared, the both of you standing outdoors a bit away from a wedding arch where people were milling around. It was not as crowded as you had expected a wedding to be. Then again you didn’t think you’d be the marrying type so what did you know...that you’d like at least a buffet table of which there was none. You were jolted from your thoughts as a man in a tux you’d only be able to describe as the Lamborghini of suits came rushing up to the both of you.

“Sans! There you are, Topps was wondering when you were coming.” The man stopped in his run to stare at you in surprise before smiling widely. His midnight black hair falling over one eye humorously as he tried to blow at it before running a hand over it. He looked like a young Eduardo Verástegui, a Spanish actor you’d seen before. 

Muy Bueno indeed. A grunt made you look over to Sans to see him socketballing you.

The dude was cute you couldn’t help it. 

Sans kept his eyelights on you as he responded to mister tall dark and handsome, a restrained humor in his tone.

“sorry had to stop for a sec, hope the new hubby wasn’t too worried.” Ouch! Hopes and blatant interest dashed. Sans knew it to because he suddenly snickered. Mister mysterio though looked between the both of you in confusion before shrugging.

“It’s all cool Sans, if we had known you had stopped to pick up a date we would’ve reserved her a seat.” You and Sans tensed and looked at him. 

What a way to make the mood awkward. 

Sans rolled his sockets as he withdrew a camera and waved it. His grin becoming prideful. You were confused by that look but choose wisely not to ask about it.

Bizarrely, it didn’t bother you to consider...what would an official date with Sans be like?

“about those pics adam?” Sans muttered, his thoughts already wandering to the dinner you’d both be having at grillby’s that night. If Adam hadn’t just married his favorite nice cream vendor he would’ve probably snapped at him. He was never partial to others ruining his planning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Edit: Will be back after kinktober! :P  
> I can be reached on Tumblr/Twitter!


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